00 Jokes

What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?

I wouldn't pay $300 to have a garbanzo bean in my mouth

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

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What's the difference between a green lentil and a chickpea?

I wouldn't pay $200 to have a green lentil on my face.

What's the difference between feminism and a $100 bill?

A $100 bill makes change

What's the difference between a lentil and a chick pea?

I won't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face.

Why did the calculator pay $100 for a pack of cigarettes?

There was a sin tax error. 8.5

What's the difference between a garbanzo and a chick pea?

I'm not spending $100 to have a garbanzo on my face.

What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives your girlfriend wild?

A $100 bill.

What do you call a circle of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins! (Happy birthday to the Queen of Soul!)

Why did the crematorium operator get a $500 bonus?

Because he'd urn-ed it.

What is the difference between a lentil and a chick pea?

Well, for starters I would never pay $200 to have a lentil on my face.

What is the difference between a lentil and a chickpea?

A pervert wouldn't pay $200 to have a lentil on his face.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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Why was Adele's phone bill $500 this month?

She must have called a 1,000 times

What is my relationship?

Alex: No sorry tha- glares at wife I'll take YOU RUINED MY LIFE KAREN for $800 Alex

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What do you call a Mexican wrestler that only fights during his 12:00 break?

A lunchador.

Why would 12:00 make the best cop?

Hands up"

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What is the cat's favourite TV show ?

The evening mews !

What is a caffeine addict's excuse for drinking coffee in the evening?

It's 8:00 somewhere!

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What do you get when you have two balls in your hand?

A man's undivided attention!

What did the butcher say when he handed his customer an empty pack of hotdogs on halloween?

Happy halloweenie

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What do you call a person with short-term memory loss?

I forget...

How will I ever find the right woman?

She replied "Forget finding the right woman, focus on being the right man."

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How do you find a British person in a crowd?

1. Shout 0800 00 2. Wait for them to shout 1066.

What do you call a British person playing a saxophone?

An Anglo Saxin'

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

How do Mexicans greet Dr. Seuss?

Jesus!

What do you get when you cross a moose with a Mexican?

A Mexican moose

Mexican Wrestler Jokes More Mexican Wrestler Jokes

What do you call a Mexican wrestler that only fights during his 12:00 break?

A lunchador.

How does a Mexican wrestler enter a room?

Through the Lucha-door.

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Why can't you tell a joke to a dwarf?

Because it will go right over his head

What's the difference between a joke and your friend's blog?

You enjoy it when a joke is posted on Facebook