55 Jokes

Why is Sammy Hagar such a bad golfer?

He can't drive 55.

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What do you call 55 men watching the superbowl?

A: Pittsburg Steelers

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Raman Noodle Jokes More Raman Noodle Jokes

What's the difference between a woman and a bowl of ramen noodles?

A bowl of ramen noodles is actually ready in 5 minutes.

How long does it take a tweaker to go shopping?

An hour 5 minutes for the Ramen noodles and foil. 55 minutes to fix the squeaky shopping cart wheel.

5 Minute Jokes More 5 Minute Jokes

How long does it take a tweaker to go shopping?

An hour 5 minutes for the Ramen noodles and foil. 55 minutes to fix the squeaky shopping cart wheel.

What's the difference between a corpse and a Chinese baby girl?

5 minutes

Comment Jokes More Comment Jokes

How do you tell if you've posted an anitjoke in /r/Jokes?

If someone comments saying you posted an antijoke and that you should rather post your joke in /r/antijokes.

How did redditor heckle the stand up comic?

The real joke is always in the comments!"

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why do Mexicans always install those tiny steering wheels in their cars?

So they can drive with the handcuffs on.

Why did nobody in the Soviet Union drive manual cars?

They were afraid of Stalin'

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a divorce and a hurricane in the south?

Nothing, someone is losing a trailer!

What's the difference between God and an electrician?

A: God doesn't think **he's** an electrician.

Tweaker Jokes More Tweaker Jokes

What type of dog did the tweaker have?

A pure bred meth lab.

What do you call a tweaker (meth addict) who goes to church?

A Crystal Methodist.

Raman Jokes More Raman Jokes

What do cannibals put in their soup?

Ramen! Before you judge harshly, I would like to state that this was invented by a six year old, all on his own, no coaching.

What does a noodle say after praying?

Ramen

Foil Jokes More Foil Jokes

What did the evil tin man say when he was run over by a steamroller?

Curses! Foil again!

What did the tin man say after he was ran over by a steamroller?

Curses! Foil again!"