Batman Jokes

What do you get if a huge hairy monster steps on Batman and Robin ?

Flatman and Ribbon !

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Why Didn't Batman Go To Church?

Because of Christian Bail

What type of movies can't batman see?

Parental Guidance.

What did batman say to the joker when he finally caught him?

Gotham

Why doesn't Batman like going to Robin's house?

They don't like rich people in Robin's hood

Who'd win if Batman fought Santa?

Before u say Batman, just remember who's watching you answer.

What if it's daytime?

Batman: *glares at Robin* Gordon: Yeah, what if it- Batman: *smoke bomb*

What's black and blue and about to hurt someone?

Batman thinking about his dead parents.

What does Batman do with all his spare money?

He makes it wayne

Why did batman fill his freezer with water bottles?

Because he wanted just ice.

What do you see?

Patient: A house and Me: Wrong it's Batman. Ok this one Patient: I se Me: Nope. Batman again.

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How does a chemist introduce Batman?

Sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium Batman!

What's Batman's favorite dessert?

Just ice cream

What is Batman's favorite sport?

Baseball.

What happend to the guys who kidnapped Batman?

They got Bale.

What do you call Batman if he leaves church?

Christian bail.

Where did the Joker prank Batman?

Got 'Em City.

Why did Batman climb the tree?

He was looking for Robin's nest.

What's the difference between batman and a black person?

Batman can go to the store without robin'

Where does batman go to the bathroom?

The batroom.

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Why didn't Gordon Ramsay like the Girl Scout cream pies?

He found a hair in one.

What does Gordon program in?

FLASH... AAAHHHHHHHH. Its the language of the universe...

Introduce Jokes More Introduce Jokes

How does a butcher introduce his wife to his friends?

Meet Patty"

What do cows do when they're introduced?

They give each other a milk shake!

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

Why do the English always carry umbrellas?

Because umbrellas can't walk

Why did Snake walk into the bar?

Because he wears an eyepatch and has poor depth perception.

Wrong Jokes More Wrong Jokes

What do you call someone who tells you they've successfully broken the Law of Excluded Middle?

WRONG.** ... or right, or something in between.

What do you call a bee from the wrong side of town?

A bumblegee

House Jokes More House Jokes

What do you get if you play a country music song backwards?

You get your wife back. Your house back. Your truck back. Your dog back...

What do you call a house full of black people?

A jail.

Store Jokes More Store Jokes

Where do bears store their military weapons?

In bearracks.

How do druggies store their data?

LSD Cards.

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

What is the Catholic Church giving up for Lent?

Answer: The Pope!

What is the most beautiful thing in the world?

Is it your right thigh, or your left? Or does the answer lie somewhere in the middle?

Chemist Jokes More Chemist Jokes

How do chemists poison each other?

With a Pb & J sandwich

Why did the chemist break his teeth?

He ate a Pb and j sandwich I'd tell you another but all the good jokes argon