Clap Jokes

Why can't the T-rex clap its hands?

Because it's dead.

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How do you make an orphans hands bleed?

Tell them to clap until daddy gets home

What do you call a group of sorority girls/fraternity guys standing in a circle?

A round of applause ...because they all have the clap.

How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying "Aww, how brave."

Why can't dinosaurs clap their hands?

Because they're dead.

Why can't dinosaurs clap?

Because they're dead.

What disease is most easily contracted by touching your hands together?

The clap.

What has hands but can't clap?

Stephen Hawking

Why can't T-Rexs clap their hands?

Because they're all dead

What do you call a man who claps at Christmas ?

Santapplause !

How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying "Aww, how brave."

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Middle Jokes More Middle Jokes

What would be your reply?

Someone stops you in the middle of the road and asks you to tell him a good joke, What would be your reply?

What does a blonde and a shotgun have in common?

You break them at the middle and load them from behind

Red Head Ninja Jokes More Red Head Ninja Jokes

What do you call a red-headed ninja?

A ginja... Ensue mildly dramatic slow clapping.

What do you call a red-head ninja?

A ginja.

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

Why don't we run through the parking lot?

me laying on the ground in front of the car that hit me Because it's dangerous

Why should a good driver always carry weed in his car?

So he always hits the green when he's driving.

Daddy Jokes More Daddy Jokes

Where's that?

Hawaii Where's that -Jamaica Daddy where was I -You weren't born Why's the folder called 'Good Ole Days'

What's the first thing a hillbilly says after losing her virginity?

Get off me Daddy, you're crushing my cigarettes.

Upvote Jokes More Upvote Jokes

What do you call making your booty clap for likes and upvotes?

Social netwerking

Where does a North Korean go after he upvotes a thread on Reddit?

To the morgue.

Tyrannosaurus Rex Jokes More Tyrannosaurus Rex Jokes

Why doesn't Tyrannosaurus Rex fly?

They're all dead!

How does a Tyrannosaurus Rex scratch it's junk?

It squats down on a Triceratops.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What'd ya call 50 n*ggers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start. P.S: N*ggers=Naggers. I hate those guys. What did you think?? )

How do you know you are at r/jokes?

The guys all look like they played football for Bronx HighSchool of Science

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many idiots does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Trick question. Idiots can't screw in lightbulbs regardless of help from other idiots.

How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Hella.