Football Coach Jokes

Why did the football coach return to the bank?

To get his quarterback.

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What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?

I want my quarter back!

Why did the football coach go to Aldi?

To get his quarter back!

Why did the football coach call his quarterback a hairdresser?

Because he missed a split-end on a curl.

Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback!!

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do you want to be when you leave college?

Student: "Alive".

Why don't house painters wear wedding rings on the job?

Nobody wants to marry an underemployed alcoholic.

Pumpkin Jokes More Pumpkin Jokes

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?

They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins.

Why is Halloween a hillbilly's favorite holiday?

Because they like to pumpkin. I'll see myself out...

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

Which bird ran for President?

H. Ross Parrot

How did Harry potter get down the mountain?

Running... JK rolling

Cinderella Jokes More Cinderella Jokes

Why was Cinderella kicked off the basketball team?

She kept running away from the ball

Why was Cinderella able to surf the web?

Because he footman turned into a mouse.

Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

How many lost cats walk by the telephone pole with their missing flier on it?

Just another reason to teach your cat to read.

What did the carnivore say to the vegan?

That's a missed-steak"

Hairdresser Jokes More Hairdresser Jokes

Why are hairdressers never late for work?

Because they know all the short cuts!

How can you see if a Hairdresser is not suitable for the job anymore?

He/she barely even cuts it anymore.

Quarter Jokes More Quarter Jokes

How is your mom just like a laundromat?

For a dollar in quarters she will take my load.

What do u call an anorexic women with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese.

Vend Jokes More Vend Jokes

What's black and steals your change?

Vending machines.

What does a vending machine and Monica Lewinsky have in common?

They both say "Insert Bill Here"