Hoof Jokes

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?

Because they lactose.

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Why does a cow have hooves but not feet?

Cause they lactose.

How does a tauren hide in a cherry tree?

He paints his hooves red.

How do you hire a horse?

Put a brick under each hoof!

Why did the horse stir his cereal with his hoof?

Because he wanted to feel his oats!

What do you call a horse that plays the violin?

Fiddler on the hoof!

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Stir Jokes More Stir Jokes

Why is James Bond a terrible motivational speaker?

Because the audiences are shaken, not stirred.

What was James Bond after he slept through an earthquake?

Shaken, not stirred.

Violin Jokes More Violin Jokes

What do you get if you cross a lamp with a violin?

A: You get light music.

What's the difference between a violin and a fiddle?

You can spill your beer on a fiddle.

Paint Jokes More Paint Jokes

What the Girlfriend, the Mistress and the Wife say Girlfriend: Are you done already?

Mistress: Are you done yet Wife: Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige...

What do you call a green man sitting on my porch?

My n*gger and I'll paint him whatever color I want.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Why did the dog feel insecure in her bathing suit?

She was a little husky.

What should we call it when a man is beautiful?

Footseveral " No but I feel like you're on the right track

Saint Patrick Day Jokes More Saint Patrick Day Jokes

What is the difference between Saint Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day?

On Saint Patrick's Day everybody wants to be Irish.

What's the difference between Saint Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day?

Everyone wants to be Irish on Saint Patrick's Day.

Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?

Toes go in first!

What do you call a guy with a toe growing out of his knee?

Tony.

Lack Jokes More Lack Jokes

Why did the marine park worker feel aimless?

Because they lacked porpoises.

Why did the worker get fired from the orange juice factory?

Lack of concentration.

Horse Jokes More Horse Jokes

What did the horse say when he regained his vision?

Merci.

What do you call the horse that lives next door?

Your NEIGHHHbor Credit: 6y/o nephew