Lindsay Lohan Jokes

How are Lindsay Lohan and the Note 7 alike?

The both leave your crotch on fire

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Why was Lindsay Lohan feeling sleepy?

He was buying drinks.

What did Santa Clause say when he came down Lindsay Lohan's chimney and found her spending Christmas Eve with her pals Miley Cyrus and Paris Hilton?

A: Ho, ho, ho!

What's the difference between Lindsay Lohan and the newspaper?

Lindsay Lohan never reads the newspaper in jail, but the newspaper always reads "Lindsay Lohan in jail"

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Jail Jokes More Jail Jokes

How to spot the toughest guy in jail?

He still has some whistle left in his fart.

What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction?

Jail break.

Miley Jokes More Miley Jokes

What do you get when you cross Miley Cyrus with an alligator?

A caiman like a wrecking ball.

What did Miley Cyrus' dancing instructor tell her to do?

Hometwerk

Ho Jokes More Ho Jokes

How could the pimp always easily locate his ho?

Because, she really stands out on the street.

What does the bee Santa Claus say ?

Ho hum hum !

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

Why shouldn't you invite a duck to go out drinking?

Because it would be a party fowl.

Why does a blonde keep empty beer bottles in her fridge?

They are for those who don't drink!

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What did King Arthur do in Camelot?

He "came" a lot.

What happens when you put the energizer bunny's battery's in backwards?

He keeps coming and coming and coming.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How did Jesus feel after the last supper?

A bit cross.

How do you feel when there's no coffee?

Depresso.

Newspaper Jokes More Newspaper Jokes

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a newspaper bag?

One is made of plastic and poses a suffocation hazard to small children. The other one contains newspapers.

Why was the feminist happy when the newspaper got it wrong?

Because she enjoyed being Ms-quoted

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

Why did the actor fire his Gorilla agent?

The big Ape kept wanting to take more than a 10% bite!

What do potheads do when they see a fire?

Stop, drop, and roll