Mute Jokes

What do you call an Italian with two broken hands?

Mute

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How do mute people tell each others secrets?

They put on mittens.

What is logic?

A mute telling a deaf guy that a blind guy saw a paraplegic running behind a bald guy while grabbing his hair.

What did the mute say to the priest?

Nothing

What do you call an Italian man without arms?

A mute. Sorry if repost.

What's the best part about being a mute?

It goes without saying...

What do you call an Italian with no hands?

Mute

How do you mute an Italian?

Tie up their hands.

What has a mouth but never speaks, Has a bed but never sleeps, And has legs but never walks?

amp;nbsp; A mute, crippled insomniac

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Secret Jokes More Secret Jokes

Why don't you tell secrets in a garden?

Because the corn have ears, the potatos have eyes and the beanstalk.

How do deaf people tell each other secrets ?

They wear mittens.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What's the difference between a little kid and a lesbian?

A little kid shouldn't run with scissors, a lesbian shouldn't scissor with the runs.

Why did the skull win 1st place in the race?

Because he ran ahead.

Understand Jokes More Understand Jokes

What did phenolphthalein do when he couldn't understand his Chemistry homework?

He just added Acetic Acid until it became clear.

Why couldn't the scientist understand what the photon was saying?

Because the photon was incoherent.

Break Hand Jokes More Break Hand Jokes

What does a Men's Rights activist call a broken hand?

Celibacy. (Edit: LOL! Seems I've "triggered" some folks with broken hands and fedora collections.)

What do you call an Italian with two broken hands?

Mute

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a nicely dressed man on a unicycle, and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?

A tire

What's the difference between America and a pot of yogurt?

If you leave a pot of yogurt alone for 200 years it develops a culture.

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

What do you call an eskimo with no friends?

An iglooser

How does a skeleton call her friends?

On a telebone.

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call an Irishman with no arms and no legs who's rolling down a hill?

Rick O'Shay.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas?

I don't know, he hasn't opened his presents yet.

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why do Japanese hate bingo?

They all scramble for cover when you call B-29

How do I stay in shape?

I stole an ostrich, it chases me around the house all day, i hate it