Mute Jokes

What do you call an Italian with two broken hands?

Mute

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How do mute people tell each others secrets?

They put on mittens.

What is logic?

A mute telling a deaf guy that a blind guy saw a paraplegic running behind a bald guy while grabbing his hair.

What did the mute say to the priest?

Nothing

What do you call an Italian man without arms?

A mute. Sorry if repost.

What's the best part about being a mute?

It goes without saying...

What do you call an Italian with no hands?

Mute

How do you mute an Italian?

Tie up their hands.

What has a mouth but never speaks, Has a bed but never sleeps, And has legs but never walks?

amp;nbsp; A mute, crippled insomniac

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How does a orphan change a light bulb?

They grab the stack of un-signed adoption papers, stand on top of them, then proceed to change the light bulb.

How does clickbait work?

Just grab this electrical cable. Then what happens WHAT HAPPENS NEXT WILL SHOCK YOU!!!!!

Repost Jokes More Repost Jokes

How many redditors does it take to point out a repost?

All of them.

What do you call a none in a wheelchair?

Virgin Mobile I'm not sorry (PS, if this is a repost, I'm sorry that I didn't see the first time it got posted 2 years ago. Please don't accuse me of reposting)

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What's a Pirate's favorite letter?

Rrrrrrrr? You think it be R but it be sea

Why are women and children evacuated first in a disaster?

So we can think about a solution in silence

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Why can't you keep a secret in a cornfield?

There's too many ears

How does a deaf and dumb tell a secret to another one?

He wears mittens.

Karl Marx Jokes More Karl Marx Jokes

Why does Karl Marx's toilet play music every time you flush it?

Because of the violins inherent in the cistern.

Why did Mr. T reject Socialism?

Because he stumbled across a quote by Karl Marx which said: "All you have to lose is your chains."

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Who gives a cluck (I wonder if the moderators will censor this joke merely on the grounds that it is categorically terrible )

What's a sharks favorite game?

Swallow the leader. *This joke has been brought to you by my 8 year old's math homework.*

Good Jokes More Good Jokes

How do you tell a good monster from a bad one?

If it's a good one you will be able to talk about it later!

What's the best part about having multiple personality disorder?

Banging your best friend's wife every night!

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What do you call a sentinel with three hands?

A watchman.

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas?

I don't know. He still hasn't opened his gifts.