St. Patrick Jokes

What is the difference between St. Patrick and Christopher Columbus?

One drove all the snakes from Ireland, the other drove away all of the Native Americans.

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What's the difference between mlk day and st. Patrick's day?

Everyone WANTS to be irish on st Patrick's day.

What is the difference between Martin Luther King Day and St. Patrick's Day?

St. Patrick's day everybody wants to be Irish.

What's the difference between MLK day and St Patrick's day?

Nobody minds being Irish for one day!!!!

What's the difference between St. Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day?

Everyone pretends to be Irish on St. Paddy's Day.

What do you call people who pretend to be Irish on St. Patrick's Day?

Counterfitz

How to tell an Irishman from a Scotsman on St. Patrick's day?

One wants to stay drunk all the time and the other doesn't want to pay the tab.

Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?

Regular rocks are too heavy.

What's green and sits on the porch?

Paddy O'Furniture. Happy St. Patrick's Day!

How do I make a St. Patrick's Day mocha?

He says Irish coffee is the only thing keeping this family together

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Mlk Jokes More Mlk Jokes

What did MLK say to the fishmonger?

I have a bream.

What are you planning on doing on MLK day?

Her: I plan on sleeping all day Me: ...Why Her: I want to have dreams too

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why cant russians drive stick?

Because they are always Stalin!

What do you call an Hispanic gentleman who drives a hybrid car?

A green bean.

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What did the man who survived a javelin headwound say to his opponent?

Thanks for opening my mind.

Why does Daenerys Targaryen listen to Hoagy Carmichael?

Because she's got Jorah on Her Mind.

St Patrick Day Jokes More St Patrick Day Jokes

What is the difference between Martin Luther King Day and St. Patrick's Day?

St. Patrick's day everybody wants to be Irish.

What do you call people who pretend to be Irish on St. Patrick's Day?

Counterfitz

80 Jokes More 80 Jokes

What did the French stoner say?

80 blaze it

What do you call a spider that likes 80s music?

A Durantula.

Pretend Jokes More Pretend Jokes

What do you call people who pretend to be Irish on St. Patrick's Day?

Counterfitz

What if Snow White just pretended to be asleep so she didn't have to clean up after little people anymore?

Because that I totally get.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

What's the difference between a chick pea and a potato?

You would pay to have a potato on you...

How much does a moil get paid?

A: Fifty dollars and a tip.

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

What do you call an Irish guy with no arms and no legs hanging out on your front porch?

Patio Furniture.

Where does an Irish family go on vacation?

A different bar.