Sugar Jokes

What's the difference between Sugar and Sweet'N Low?

Sugar is on the lips. :-)

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What did they call the sugar that went to space?

Intergalactose

What country has many sugar?

sweetzerland

What's the difference between a bag of sugar and a dead baby?

I don't use sugar in my signature cookies.

What do you get when you boil tree trunks with sugar?

Log jam.

Why sugars are very unhappy these days?

It is sweet but still is not getting added do any thing!

Where's the cake?

Mom of kid: We don't believe in sugar. Me: I promise it's real. I've seen it with my own eyes.

What did Adam do when he wanted some sugar?

He raised Cain.

Why won't you loan a neighbor a cup of sugar?

sigh "You're a pile of ants wearing a bathrobe." bathrobe sags dejectedly

What are some products of the West Indies?

Student: I don't know. Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.

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Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What do you call a fish without an eye?

A Fsh

How do you get herpes viral infection of the eye?

Looking for love in all the wrong places.

Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why are rivers lazy?

Because they never get off their beds.

How is my wife doing?

Doctor: I'm so sorry. The accident has left her in a vegetative-like state and I don't think she'll ever recover. She can barely move her limbs, if at all, and will be confined to a bed or wheelchair without the ability to ever walk again. You'll need to care for her 24/7, clothe her, feed her, bathe her, and she'll have no control of her bladder or bowels. Again, I'm so, so, sorry... ..... ..... ..... Just kidding! She's dead.

Dead Baby Jokes More Dead Baby Jokes

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Porsche?

I've never been inside a Porsche. Nor do I have 12 Porsches in my garage.

What's the difference between babies and love?

Love doesn't burn. What's worst part about making love to a dead baby. Digging up the coffin. How long does take to play hide and seek with a dead baby? It depends how small the pieces are.

Utensil Jokes More Utensil Jokes

What did the writing utensil take for his high sugar level?

A: Pencil-in.

What did Jonathan Ross say after breaking in to a large kitchen to steal some utensils?

It was worth the whisk

Space Jokes More Space Jokes

What do monkeys drink in space?

Orangu-Tang.

What kind of currency do astronauts use in space?

Starbucks

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

What's the difference.... Between my girlfriend and santa?

Some people actually believe santa exist.

What did the police officer say to the midget complaining that someone picked his pocket?

I can't believe someone would stoop so low.

Promise Jokes More Promise Jokes

Why is a reflection always twice as good as the real thing?

i actually don't know where to post this idea, true jokes maybe?... There has to be a food for thought sub. This is your OP, I promise to deliver!

Why was Wycleff Jean on L&O this week?

He only promised to be gone until November

Pencil Jokes More Pencil Jokes

Why can't pencils have babies?

Because they have rubbers on their end.

What does a mathematics professor do when he is constipated?

He works it out with a pencil.