Transplant Jokes

What did the tree say while it was being transplanted?

Wheeeeeeeee!!!!!

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What do you call a human that's now a cactus?

A transplant.

What do you call a plant getting kidney surgery?

A transplant

What does a redneck garden gnome hate more than anything?

Transplants

Why are conductors' hearts popular for transplants?

A: They've had little use.

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What's the worst thing a girl can wear to bed?

A condom

When would a discount be a bad thing?

Have 3 abortions and get the fourth free.

Plant Jokes More Plant Jokes

How do you plant dope?

Bury a blonde.

What did the little acorn say when it got planted and grew up?

Geometry.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How are PCs different from woman?

I know how to turn a PC on.

How do you know Tiger Woods is one of the richest people in the world?

He plays golf.

Save Jokes More Save Jokes

Why were Popeye's forearms so big?

Because Olive Oyl was saving herself for marriage.

How'd you die?

I got shot trying to save my fellow soldiers lives in war. You " "I got trampled trying to save on a flat screen" "Oh.."

Delivery Jokes More Delivery Jokes

How can you tell when a German is joking?

Don't worry, he will inform you after delivery of the punchline has taken place. Just a joke!

What a common problem with r/jokes and FedEx?

Delivery

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why are elephants grey ?

So you can tell them from flamingos !

How can you tell if a picture was taken with a GoPro?

because the owner will tell you

Phlegm Jokes More Phlegm Jokes

What's the worst thing about a lung transplant?

Coughing up someone else's phlegm

What's the worst part of having a lung transplant?

Knowing that the first couple of times you cough that the phlegm isn't yours.

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why was Karl Marx against Chinese mutes?

Because he hated the B shu!

Why do programmers hate designing flood defence simulations?

Because of the overflow errors!