Uber Jokes

What did the sarcastic taximan say when he lost his job?

Oh well that's just uber, isn't it

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Why did the cab driver did not get time for his family?

Because he was Uber busy.

What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common?

Immigrants

What do you call a white guy with 2 black guys in the back of the car?

The police. What do you call a black guy with 2 white guys in the back of the car Uber!

Why can't PC gamers use Uber?

Too many incompatible drivers.

What do laws and virgins have in common?

They're both there to be violated. (The sad part is that a Portuguese Taxi Driver actually said that seriously in a protest against Uber)

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Law Jokes More Law Jokes

What is the difference... What is the difference between unlawful and illegal?

One is against the law and the other is a sick bird.

What's worse than your mother-in-law?

My mother-in-law.

Family Jokes More Family Jokes

What's the worst part about admitting to your friends and family you play PokemanGo?

Having to admit you have autism :,P

What is the hardest thing to do after starting a family?

Ending them.

Cab Driver Jokes More Cab Driver Jokes

Why did the cab driver get a divorce?

Because he had a fare.

Why did the cab driver did not get time for his family?

Because he was Uber busy.

Police Jokes More Police Jokes

What do the Police and Pokemon have in common?

They gotta catch 'Jamal

What did the police say to the hot dog?

You are under arrest.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of money does Mario use?

8-bitcoins

What machine should I use at the gym to impress girls?

The ATM

Ebay Jokes More Ebay Jokes

What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common?

Immigrants

What's the difference between a proclamation from the Vatican and a mail-order husband from ebay?

One's a papal mandate and the other's a paypal man-date.

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

What do The Walking Dead and the state of Wisconsin have in common?

They both have a hated governor.

Why did the musician hate getting drunk?

He always had treble finding his keys!

Nietzsche Jokes More Nietzsche Jokes

Why can't Nietzsche use pencils?

Because they're all pointless

What did Nietzsche tell his editor when he finished writing Thus Spoke Zarathustra?

It's over, man.