Wood Chipper Jokes

What's the difference between jam and jelly?

You can't jelly someone into a wood chipper.

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How do you start a baby shower?

Throw it into a wood chipper.

What do you get when you drop a baby into a wood chipper?

Well an erection of course.

What's the difference between a redwood and a dead baby?

A redwood won't fit in a wood chipper.

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Jelly Jokes More Jelly Jokes

What's the difference between jam and jelly?

You can't jelly someone into a wood chipper.

What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly ?

The collie wobbles !

Course Jokes More Course Jokes

How do you like it?

Me: Salty...of course *slaps down $20 CG: We'll take two pretzels with salt Get outta the gutter pervs

Which horse runs the city?

The mare, of course

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What did the spaghetti say to the other spaghetti?

Pasta la vista, baby!

Who do women produce milk for?

The baby and the dad.

Dead Baby Jokes More Dead Baby Jokes

What do you call a dead baby hanging on a wall?

Art

What's the difference between a Porsche and a trash bag full of dead babies?

I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

What's the difference between Madonna and a bowling ball ?

You can only fit three fingers in the bowling ball.

What they say: Want a bite of my sandwich?

What I hear: How much of this sandwich can you fit in your mouth

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

Why do people in wheelchairs wear shoes?

Do they think they're gonna magically start walking

Why did the skeletons start dancing?

Because they forgot the g in graveyard.

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

What do you get when you throw a baby against a wall?

An erection

How do you throw a party in space?

You planet

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a women driving strawberries?

None, both are collect in a field.

What's the difference between a mixologist and a bartender?

About ten minutes.