It doesn't matter. We'll all be laughing too hard to care.
He broke up with his girlfriend.
Because he stumbled across a quote by Karl Marx which said: "All you have to lose is your chains."
You'll eventually end up with enough bricks to build a free garage.
It takes too long to hollow out her head. (I got this one from my uncle)
Ten tickles
I'm ready to partiem with my perdiem *sorry, not a dad, and the bar tender didn't laugh either
Dress them up as dead lions
They both care way too much about the c Dynasty.
Cuz Wu Tang Clan got nuttin' to shuck with.
Let's go get Jobs.
RAM crackers
Hawa-a-ai-i
It doesn't matter where you drop them off.
because Mace Windu nuffin
They both pull strings for work. (Inspired by Bo Burnham, this popped into my head the other day)
Batteries have a positive side! inspired by: http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/2zlrot/howmanyfeministsdoesittaketochangea/
Watson the menu
Sedimentary my dear Watson!
IBM
IBM!
A hedge fund manager