What do you call it when a hedge fund manager loses his job to a Watson inspired AI built by IBM?

It doesn't matter. We'll all be laughing too hard to care.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

How did Jared Fogel lose 60 pounds?

He broke up with his girlfriend.

Why did Mr. T reject Socialism?

Because he stumbled across a quote by Karl Marx which said: "All you have to lose is your chains."

Build Jokes More Build Jokes

What's the best thing about owning a car in Liverpool?

You'll eventually end up with enough bricks to build a free garage.

Why is it quicker to build a snowman than a snowwoman?

It takes too long to hollow out her head. (I got this one from my uncle)

Laugh Jokes More Laugh Jokes

How many tickles does it take to make laugh an octopus ?

Ten tickles

What did the alcoholic Dad, away on business, say to the bartender at the hotel bar?

I'm ready to partiem with my perdiem *sorry, not a dad, and the bar tender didn't laugh either

Care Jokes More Care Jokes

How do you get Americans to care about the Sudanese genocide?

Dress them up as dead lions

What do Vietnamese historians and Southern rednecks have in common?

They both care way too much about the c Dynasty.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why did Raekwon tha Chef get fired from his job at an oyster bar?

Cuz Wu Tang Clan got nuttin' to shuck with.

What did one cancer cell say to the other cancer cell ?

Let's go get Jobs.

Ai Jokes More Ai Jokes

What is an AI's favorite food?

RAM crackers

Where is Disturbed's favorite vacation spot?

Hawa-a-ai-i

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

What's the best thing about picking up a homeless chick?

It doesn't matter where you drop them off.

Why did Black Lives Matter arrange a protest on Coruscant?

because Mace Windu nuffin

Inspire Jokes More Inspire Jokes

What do a Marionette User and Tampon Thief have in common?

They both pull strings for work. (Inspired by Bo Burnham, this popped into my head the other day)

What's the difference between a feminist and a battery?

Batteries have a positive side! inspired by: http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/2zlrot/howmanyfeministsdoesittaketochangea/

Watson Jokes More Watson Jokes

What did Sherlock ask his friend when he wanted to know what they were having for dinner?

Watson the menu

What did Sherrock Holmes say to his partner?

Sedimentary my dear Watson!

Ibm Jokes More Ibm Jokes

Where do tech guys with diarrhea go to work?

IBM

What does Hulk say when he poops?

IBM!

Hedge Fund Manager Jokes More Hedge Fund Manager Jokes

What do you call it when a hedge fund manager loses his job to a Watson inspired AI built by IBM?

It doesn't matter. We'll all be laughing too hard to care.

What do you call the CFO of a landscaping company?

A hedge fund manager