Watson Jokes

Why did Sherlock Holmes get a colonoscopy?

It's alimentary, Watson.

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What did Watson and Crick study to find DNA?

Rosalind Franklin's notes.

What type of rock is this Holmes?

It's sedimentary my dear Watson!

How did Watson and crick blow their chance with a hot girl?

They said, "baby you'd look good if you got a pair of skinny genes"

What education should a private detective have?

Elementary, my dear Watson.

What is Sherlock Holmes' favorite tree?

A-lemon-tree my dear Watson.

What are you planting?

said Watson. "It's a lemon tree, my dear Watson."

What do you call Watson when Sherlock isn't around?

Holmeless

How did Sherlock reply to Watson's inquiry, "Sherlock, where did you get all of these lemons?

A lemon tree, my dear Watson."

How old is this girl?

Elementary, my dear Watson."

What the hell is that?

Sherlock responds, "A lemon tree my dear Watson."

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What did Sherrock Holmes say to his partner?

Sedimentary my dear Watson!

Where did you get so many lemons?

Holmes replies, "A lemon tree, Watson.."

What do you suppose broke this window Mr. Holmes?

It's a limb entry, my dear Watson!

What's a ten-letter word meaning 'supplying nourishment'?

Sherlock replied, "Alimentary, my dear Watson."

What did Sherlock ask his friend when he wanted to know what they were having for dinner?

Watson the menu

How would you like your school girls today, Mr. Holmes?

Elementary, my dear Watson.

What up Holmes?

Watson

What do you call it when a hedge fund manager loses his job to a Watson inspired AI built by IBM?

It doesn't matter. We'll all be laughing too hard to care.

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Education Jokes More Education Jokes

Where does Lance Armstrong go to continue his education?

http://cms.bsu.edu/

Where did you receive your education?

Me: Yale Interviewer: Wow! When did you graduate Me: I yust got out in Yuly

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What's a reporter's favorite food?

Ice cream because they always want a scoop!

What did the diver say to the oyster?

I want that pearl! Don't be shellfish!

Holme Jokes More Holme Jokes

What did the Mexican say when his roof fell on him?

Get off me Holmes!

What did the mexican-american say when two houses landed on him?

Get off me holmes!

Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

What's the last thing the ISIS fighters' wife said before she blew herself up?

Bahhh

When do cops blow up and destroy shopping centers and Walmarts?

During Black Friday.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

What can you find in both medieval English castles and American art museums?

Norman Rock Wells.

What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of Helium?

HeHe

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

Why were you late ?

Sorry teacher I overslept. You mean you need to sleep at home too !

What do they always forget to do after filming a season of Game of Thrones?

The last one out is meant to get the Wights

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What's easier to pick up the heavier it is?

A girl.

Why do some girls walk in threes?

They can't even.

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

How do I do that?

he asked. "Carefully" replied the vet.

What did the CPU say to the RAM?

Sorry to cache you out but I want the data closer. The RAM replied: you're right, "life" is too short.