Black Friday Jokes

What did Nala tell Simba after seeing a herd of women on Black Friday?

You gotta Mufasa"

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When do cops blow up and destroy shopping centers and Walmarts?

During Black Friday.

Why did the Ferguson protesters not participate in Black Friday?

Because they have already looted everything they would have bought anyway.

Where can you find the best Black Friday deals with items at 100% off?

Ferguson!

What is the worst place to go on Black Friday?

Awnser: Home Depot They have power tools lol

How is the Battle for Hogwarts like a Black Friday sale?

Weasley twins are 50% off

Why does Meek Mill avoid shopping on Black Friday?

Because the stores advertise "Back to Back" savings.

Why did Han go out Black Friday shopping.?

because the prices were Solo

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What rhymes with California?

Every Red Hot Chili Peppers song writing session ever

How do you know Justin Bieber is Canadian?

Only a Canadian could get a #1 on Billboard with a song called Sorry.

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What did the armless warrior say to his opponent before battle?

You're about to meet da-feet!

What do you call a battle of wordplay?

Pun-fu fighting

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

How are Americans and poles similar?

Running into one could really ruin your day.

Why should a honeymoon only be six days?

ANSWER: Because seven days makes a whole week.

Item Jokes More Item Jokes

What is one item which has never been affected by inflation?

Deer's Balls There are always under a buck

Where can you find the best Black Friday deals with items at 100% off?

Ferguson!

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

What do you buy a recently neutered cat?

Spay Roses.

What brings you to speed dating?

Me: I just ran out of the fancy shampoo my previous GF bought for me.

Home Depot Jokes More Home Depot Jokes

What did Lil' Jon do when Home Depot employee tried to sell him a lightbulb?

Turned down 4 watt

What is the worst place to go on Black Friday?

Awnser: Home Depot They have power tools lol

Weasley Twin Jokes More Weasley Twin Jokes

What walks on eight legs until the age of one, four legs until the age of twenty, and two legs after?

The Weasley twins

How is the Battle for Hogwarts like a Black Friday sale?

Weasley twins are 50% off

Shop Jokes More Shop Jokes

Why was the blonde crawling on the ground in the shop?

She was trying to find the lowest prices

Where do psychopaths shop?

In sainsburys