Friday Jokes

Why is Friday the best day of the week?

Its the 5/7 day of the week

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Where do graphic designers go for a drink?

CGI Friday's

What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Iowa?

Prom

Where do Muslims go after their Friday prayer?

To the Allahu Akbar

What is the only thing on earth that goes "ha ha" on a Monday?

A bit late, but.... A blonde who heard a joke on Friday.

Where do Crows hang out on friday night?

The crow bar.

Where do Crows hang out on a friday nght?

At a crow bar.

What do brunettes and red-heads do on Friday nights?

Make blonde jokes!

What happened when the cannibal got a religion?

He only ate Catholics on Fridays!

How does an international banker have a good Friday night?

He goes to a bar and slips somebody a Rupee, then gives them a Franc and some Deutsche Marks.

Why does the letter "r" make all the difference between Friday and Sunday?

payday vs prayday.

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What happened when the two lovers were watching a scary movie in a year when Valentine's day happened to fall on Friday the 13th?

Oh wait, nevermind. I'm an idiot...*

How is today Monday?

It was Friday only a few hours ago...

What do you get when you cross Jesus and a couple of criminals?

A good Friday

What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Wisconsin?

Prom night.

Where do Pixar employees go for Happy Hour?

CGI Friday's.

Why are there so many dumb blonde jokes?

it gives brunnettes and redheads something to do on friday and saturday nights!

What was Jesus never thankful for?

Fridays.

What day do fries hate the most?

Friday

What u doing?

Math, it's due Friday" *I slowly crumple the paper and put it in my mouth* They'll never believe u

How'd he do it?

The horses name was Friday.

Why do they call the day after Thanksgiving "Black Friday"?

Because everything is a steal.

What you gonna do on St. Valentine's day?

What day is it " "Friday." "Shepherd's Pie."

How did Jesus get across Jerusalem on a busy Friday afternoon?

Cross traffic doesn't stop.

Why are you all so excited it's Friday?

Monday will be here in 5 minutes.

What do bored frogs do on a Friday night?

They go Bar Hopping!...

Which day do chickens hate the most?

Friday.

What song can never be played on #throwback Thursday?

Friday by Rebecca Black

What do you call the day after a sad Friday?

A sadder day.

Where were you on Friday?

Me: It was a holiday. Boss: HALLOWEEN IS NOT A PAID HOLIDAY! Me: It is if you go as Christmas. Boss:...

What's the worst thing about Fridays?

Realizing it's only Tuesday.

Where do cows go on Friday nights?

A: To the moovies.

What do you get if you have strep throat on Friday?

Saturday Night Fever.

What are your plans for Easter?

Husband: Same as Jesus.. Wife: What do you mean Husband:I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!!

What did Justin Verlander finish on Friday?

Kate's back.

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Graphic Designer Jokes More Graphic Designer Jokes

How many graphic designers does it take to change a light bulb?

Does it have to be a light bulb? 'Cause I had this other idea...

How can you tell between a graphic designer and recruiter?

Ask them to pronounce "hires"

Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

What do women and fuses have in common?

They blow when they get turned on.

What do the lady reindeer do on Christmas eve?

They hit the town and blow a few bucks.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What's the difference between a blonde and McDonald's?

A: A blonde serves more people in a night.

How fast can Klingon's run?

About Warf speed. My mom made this joke up last night at a bbq party. She likes to think she is funnier on holidays. Thanks, Mom.

Tractor Jokes More Tractor Jokes

How does a tractor break up with its boyfriend?

With a John Deere letter.

How did the farmer find his lost cow?

He tractor down

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell who the extroverted engineers are?

They're the ones who look at YOUR shoes when they talk to you.

Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh. - *My little brother told me this one hit me with a little bit of nostalgia.*

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

Why do jihadists drink instant coffee?

Because they hate the french press...

How alcoholic is a drink that's guaranteed to get you drunk?

Fool proof!

Herd Jokes More Herd Jokes

What do you call a big cat disguised to blend in with a herd of sheep?

A sheopard.

What did the farmer say when the townspeople told him all of his cows were in town..?

I herd.

Park Jokes More Park Jokes

What do you do when you see a space man?

Park your car, man.

What did the lead singer of The Prodigy say to the guy parking his Mini Cooper?

Back my Smitch Up!