Castle Jokes

What's grey and can't swim?

A castle

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Why are all castles disabled?

They all have tur-rets

How long does it take to build a castle?

A Fortnight

Why couldn't Mario ever watch Netflix with Peach?

Because the princess was always on another Castle.

What do I have in common with Franz Kafka?

Neither of us have finished The Castle.

How do whores in Westeros get into the castle?

Hodor.

What's the similarity between designer jeans and cheaply made castles?

No ballroom

What is the rain's favorite medieval reenactment?

Storming a castle.

What do you call a chess blunder where you lose your castle?

A Rook-ey mistake.

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Why was the blond happy she finished the jigsaw puzzle in six months?

It said 2 to 4 years on the box.

What do women and KFC have in common?

One you are finished with the breast and the thighs, you still have a greasy box to put your bone

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How do whores in Westeros get into the castle?

Hodor.

Whores?

Derivatives

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Why do engineering majors refer to themselves "engineers"?

You don't see literature majors calling themselves Starbucks baristas

What do you call a race run by baristas?

A **decaf**alon

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What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?

3.99 a minute.

Why Did The Man With One Hand Go To The Shopping Centre?

To go to the second hand shop

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Why did Tim Cook fire an unpaid intern lately?

His name was Jack

Who you must not greet on a plane?

HI Jack!

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What do a coffee shop and a Japanese castle siege have in common?

Baristas

What do you call a coffee shop where drug deals go down?

The trapp!

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What do you find in an alley that has holes in it?

M-my parents " "No! A bowling ball! I'm so sorry..."

What travels down an alley and has holes in it?

A bowling ball. Or Bruce Wayne's parents.

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What did the man do after being found guilty of sabotaging the moonmission?

He Apollo-gized.

How does an Arab farmer find his goat in the sand dunes?

Very satisfying.