Elton John Jokes

What do Elton John and the Berlin wall have in common?

A lot of young men went over it. And they would cowardly get shot from the back.

This joke may have profanity.

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What's the difference between Elton John's chin and Tiger Woods?

Tiger Woods hasn't hit as many balls.

What's hit more balls than David Beckham's right foot?

Elton John's chin.

What did Elton John call his tribute to Mother Teresa?

Sandals in the Bin

Why did Elton John have to go to hospital after the Queen concert?

They found traces of Mercury in him.

What's pink and sits on a piano chair?

Elton's John

What is both a fruit and a vegetable?

Elton John in a coma.

What's Elton John's favorite kind of conditioner?

Levon.

What kind of fruit is also a vegetable?

Elton John in a coma.

Why did Elton John's trucking company only work weekends?

Because Saturday nights alright for freighting.

What is Oedipus Rex's Mom's favorite Elton John song?

Don't Let The Son Go Down On Me

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What's a GF?

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What is the difference between confident and confidential?

Dad says: "You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, THAT is confidential.

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What do you call a women who cant draw?

Trace

Why did Elton John have to go to hospital after the Queen concert?

They found traces of Mercury in him.

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Where does he go next?

The hospital. Why does he go to the hospital For Alcohol poisoning

Who is the coolest guy at the hospital?

The ultra sound guy. And who covers when hes off sick The hip replacement guy.

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What do you call a robber who looks like David Beckham?

Bandit like Beckham

What's hit more balls than David Beckham's right foot?

Elton John's chin.

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What is the difference between a GOOD and a BAD girl?

What is the difference between a GOOD and a BAD girl? A GOOD girl goes to a party, goes home then goes to bed. A BAD girl goes to a party, goes to bed then goes home.

What's the difference between a dog and a cyclist?

When you run over a dog you don't have to go back and get the GoPro.

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What did the bishop say to a large group of priest at the overnight camp for young boys?

Let us prey.'

How about Santa?

Ok but let's add something fierce so they are afraid to defy him

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What are your symptoms?

I can't laugh and I can't sing. I'm finding it hard to do anything!"

Why was the Boy having trouble finding power in the Cul-de-sac?

There was no outlet

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What is it called when you throw a tin can into a recycling bin?

A recycling TIN!

What's worse than finding a dead baby in the garbage can?

Finding a dead baby in the recycle bin.