Empire State Building Jokes

What's the difference between negligence and falling off of the empire state building?

Nothing if you're a gorilla.

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What does Michael Jackson do when he gets kids to the top of the Empire State building?

Tosses them off.

Why did King Kong.... Climb the Empire State Building?

He couldn't fit in the elevator.

How long does it take for a newborn to fall from the empire state building?

About 16 seconds

How did the gangster die below the Empire State Building?

Someone dropped a dime on him.

What's the difference between your mom and the Empire State Building?

Not everyone's been up the Empire State Building

What's Chinese and climbs the Empire State Building?

Ping Pong

What do you get when you drop an egg off the Empire State Building?

New Yolk

What do you get if you cross King Kong with a giant frog?

A monster that climbs up the Empire State Building and catches aeroplanes with its tongue.

What's big and hairy and climbs up the Empire State Building in a dress?

Queen Kong.

Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?

Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.

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Why wasn't the aeroplane invented in China?

Because two Wongs don't make a Wright.

What is black and yellow and buzzes along at 30000 feet ?

A bee is an aeroplane !

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

What happens when you drop a decimal point in water ?

it floats.

What did the oyster say to the fish who stole it's shell?

Stop being shellfish!" *drops microphone, walks away*

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

Why isn't Mexico in the Summer Olympics?

Everyone who can run, jump, and swim are already over here.

Why did the chicken jump into the bag of popcorn?

The kernel was looking for him.

Michael Jackson Jokes More Michael Jackson Jokes

Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 20 years?

Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 20 years? Michael Jackson

What would Michael Jackson be doing if he were alive right now?

Probably clawing at the inside of his coffin.

Dime Jokes More Dime Jokes

Why isn't a dime worth as much today as it used to be?

Because the dimes (times) have changed.

How did the gangster die below the Empire State Building?

Someone dropped a dime on him.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Who hasn't" muttered daddy bear. "What?

You wanna do this now, in front of the kid!"

When punching a toddler, how hard is too hard?

Calm down... I'm not talking about MY kid. I know how hard to punch her. I'm her mother.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What if they had a call center where they call you everyday with a mission to make you laugh?

But instead of a call center, they called it a lol center! So much lol, that it will make you fall!

What's the difference between someone falling from 21st floor and 1st floor?

21st floor person goes: AHHHHHHHHHH 1st floor goes: AHHHHHHHHHH

Toss Jokes More Toss Jokes

How do you make a cat go "woof"?

Douse it with petrol and toss a lit match. WOOF!

What is the similarity between women and garbagebags?

You fill them up and toss them out the door!