Free Jokes

Why did the EU start downloading random stuff to it's computer?

It had freed up one GB of space.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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Coffee Mug

What did Abe Lincoln say after a three day drinking binge?

Wait I freed ?!?!?"

How did the turtle with no arms and no legs cross the freeway?

Here's a hint: take the F out of Free and take the F out of Way

What did Abraham Lincoln say after a three-day drinking spree?

I freed the what?"

How did the 3 legged frog get across the 4 lane freeway?

Take the F out of Free, and the F out of way and you'll have your answer.

What color are apples?

BOBO THE GORILLA: (signing) Please free me from this prison ME: (writing) Still struggling with colors

What did Abraham Lincoln say after a two week drunk?

I freed what

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Harry Potter?

Santa would never free an elf.

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Quadriplegic Jokes More Quadriplegic Jokes

What do you call a Quadriplegic in the ocean?

Bob. *I'm so sorry*

How do you give a quadriplegic a headache?

Ask him to hold open the elevator door

Amazon Jokes More Amazon Jokes

What is the best food to order from Amazon?

Prime Rib

Why is working at Amazon warehouse like being a coke addict?

You spend 10 hours a day doing nothing but clearing lines.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What's the easiest way to tell if somebody's lying?

He/she's not sitting or standing!

Why couldn't the bicycle stand anymore?

It was two tired.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

What do you find inside a clean nose?

Fingerprints

Why did the strawberry take the fig to the movies?

Because he couldn't find a date!

Realise Jokes More Realise Jokes

Why did the fish cross the ocean?

Watching the National Geographic channel always makes me wonder how animals like fish manage to travel thousands of miles,and how they know where to go. Then I realised they can measure distances so well because they have their own scales.

When you realise your friend is an idiot" Stories!?

Hey guys, I just recently found out that my friend is an idiot. I was talking with him on Facebook and I was telling him about this game that was free online, and he says "I'm on my way to see my girlfriend". I'm sorry but WHAT? well I have a fish tank. Feel free to comment down below your stories about how you realised your friend is an idiot.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What did the cow say to the paintbrush?

Moo. As told by my kid this morning.

What do you call a smoothie that came out too thick?

A chunky. Credit to my dad this morning..

King Jokes More King Jokes

Why do Lannisters have such big beds?

GoT because they push twins together to make a king.

What's one profession that doctors, lawyers, even the king of Saudi Arabia and the presidents of the USSR and US bow their heads to?

Barbers.

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

How does someone with amnesia tell a joke?

I don't remember.

Why is Bruce Lee so good at telling jokes?

Because if his punch line doesn't work, you still get a kick out of it.