Honeydew Jokes

What did the watermelon say to the honeydew?

I'm sorry baby, we just cantaloupe."

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Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

Why won't the honeydew marry the watermelon?

Because they cantaloupe..

Why was the baby Honeydew sad?

Because it was Meloncholic

What did the runaway melon say to the honeydew on Valentine's Day?

I cantaloupe.

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What did the plant say to the runaway melons in love?

You cantelope!

What did the runaway melon say to the honeydew on Valentine's Day?

I cantaloupe.

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What do you call a baby Cosmonaut?

Yuri Googoogagarin. I'll see myself out...

Howdo you stop a baby from running in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

Valentine Day Jokes More Valentine Day Jokes

What kind of flowers do you never give on Valentine's Day?

Cauliflowers!

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!

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Me: Tiny Houses. 9: Wow it's tiny! Who's gonna live there Me: Two people. 9: Are they married Me: Not for long.

What do you call it when a really large number marries a small number?

A Ranged Marriage

Theirs Jokes More Theirs Jokes

How do you know if an introvert likes you when you're talking to them?

They'll stare at your shoes instead of theirs.

What product of theirs is most commonly exported?

Newborn girls.

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

What did the commander say when she realized that she had left Matt Damon on Mars?

I have left my Mark on Mars"

How many leftists does it take to change a lightbulb?

8,000 to protest against the broken lightbulb but 0 to realize it won't change anything.

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

Whopper at BK You hear BK is now selling a black whopper?

They are already cancelling it because it will never work and everyone wants it for free ...... lmao

What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

Family Jokes More Family Jokes

Why are Alabama weddings so small?

They've only gotta invite one family

What the difference between a Mexican and a bench?

The bench can support a family my first post here, a friend told me this joke.