Jfk Jokes

Why JFK doesn't wear hats?

It is an airport.

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Why didn't JFK ever like vodka?

Because he couldn't handle a few shots

What did Marily Monroe and Lee Harvey Oswald have in common?

They both banged JFK

What did JFK say about his multiple affairs?

I did them not because they were easy, but because I was hard."

What do you get when you order a JFK?

An americano with an extra shot

Why couldn't JFK be a boxer?

He couldn't take shots to the head.

What was the last thing that went through JFK's head?

A bullet.

What did JFK say before going to visit Marilyn Monroe?

I choose to go to Marilyn's hotel room this night and do the naughty things, not because she is easy, but because I am hard.

How do we know JFK was a fan of PDA?

He was all over his wife at the parade

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Order Jokes More Order Jokes

A ham sandwhich walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says...

I'm sorry, we don't serve food here

What does M.Night Shyamalan always order when he goes out for ice cream?

A large twist cone.

Parade Jokes More Parade Jokes

What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hare-line.

How many gears does a French Tank have?

5. 4 reverse and 1 forward for parades.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why did the feminist get fired from Panera?

Because she ate all the cookies and didn't know how to make a sandwich.

Why couldn't the melons be together?

Everyone knows melons cantaloupe.

Bang Jokes More Bang Jokes

What does a desperate Mexican do?

Bangs his head against the wall.

What is a banged-up used car?

A car in first-crash condition.

Visit Jokes More Visit Jokes

When an ape visits his tailor what kind of a suit does he order?

A zoo-t suit!

Why did the vegan zombie visit the coma ward?

Because it only ate vegetables.

Martha Vineyard Jokes More Martha Vineyard Jokes

What do you call a crossdressing nanny in Martha's Vineyard?

A Nantucket.

What did JFK Jr miss most about Martha's Vineyard?

The runway

Console Jokes More Console Jokes

What does a Maple leaf fan do when they win the cup?

Turn off their console and go to sleep.

What's the worst thing about owning a console?

Memories of your dad leaving you are in 30fps

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Who invented the brush they put next to the toilet?

That thing hurts!

Whats the last thing that goes through a fly's brain before it hits my car windshield?

Its arse.