Meth Head Jokes

What's the best thing about being a meth head?

1 sleep until Christmas.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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How do you know you're on the phone with a meth head?

When comcast puts them on hold and they don't hang up

How do you tell the difference between a meth head and a hillbilly?

The meth head still has teeth.

Why do meth heads love Halloween?

Three sleeps 'till Christmas!

What do you call a meth-head that's been up for 2 weeks?

A two-weeker

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Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What do you call a turtle who sleeps during the day and is awake at night?

Nocturtle

What do you call a Mexican girl who loves to sleep around?

A Burrithoe

Phone Jokes More Phone Jokes

What did the muslim telemarketer say when he picked up the phone?

Halal?

How does Kylo Ren talk on the phone?

A Hans free device

Halloween Jokes More Halloween Jokes

Why was the ghost sad on Halloween?

He ain't have no boo

What kind of protozoa likes Halloween?

An amoeboo!

Set Jokes More Set Jokes

What would you call a set of old school rapper emojis?

Em-OGs

Why didn't Oscar Pistorius get a new bathroom door?

Because his wife was dead-set against it...

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What do you call a dog who loves to be dominated?

A sub woofer. Thank you & God Bless

What's one thing you hated as a kid but love as an adult?

Molestation.

Smoke Jokes More Smoke Jokes

What did the old chimney say to the younger chimney?

You're too young to smoke!

How do you find out what's in an e-cigarette?

Just ask someone not to smoke it next to you.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

Why do Russians celebrate Christmas on the 7th of January?

Cause eight reindeer and a sleigh are a lot quicker than 6 pigs and a stoneboat.

What do you call a search engine that sings Christmas songs?

Michael google.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many Ricks from TWD does it take to change a light bulb?

Carl gets shot in the face.

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a hardware problem.