Object Jokes

Why do objects disappear when you move them twice?

Because you remove them.

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What is the only man made object visible from space?

Holland.

What is the difference between a robot and a sandwich?

Everything. These two objects have nothing in common.

What object crashes the most?

A kaleidoscope!

Why did got object to the wedding between the catholic man and the catholic woman?

He doesn't approve of same sect marriage

What do you call the object Attila the Hun uses to brush his leg hair?

A Hun knee comb.

What's the difference between a heroine and heroin?

One's an object that's easily abused, the other's a drug.

What type of objects do not accelerate, regardless of the force applied?

Letterhead and envelopes. No matter how hard you try, they remain stationery!

How does a frog fasten two objects together?

Rivets.

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What's a pirate's favorite letter in the alphabet?

ARRGGHH" (R) Your response = (in a pirate voice of course) "You'd think it'd be the ARRGGHH but it actually be the SEA!!! (C)

What do r/jokes subscribers and Catholic priests have in common?

Both think the shorter the better.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of soap do you use to clean a dirty joke?

Bawdy wash.

What kind of bathroom does Napoleon use?

A Waterloo

Yell Jokes More Yell Jokes

What would Ronald Reagan be doing if he were alive today?

He'd be scratching at the lid of his coffin yelling, "Let me out! I'm alive! Let me out!!"

How do I get to the other side of the river?

The blonde yells back "You are on the other side!"

Crash Jokes More Crash Jokes

Why did the people's phones stop working on the plane's that crashed into the twin towers?

They were in airplane mode. (I'm so sorry)

Why did the drunk fall asleep at the wheel?

He needed a place to crash.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What's the difference between a man who owns a gun and a man who owns a bank?

A man with a gun can rob a bank. A man with a bank can rob the world. (Disclaimer: reword of someone else's post to FB today.)

Why couldn't the Coast Guard save the hippie?

Because he was wayyy far out man.

Programming Language Jokes More Programming Language Jokes

What programming languages would we use if C didn't exist?

Ans: PASAL, OBOL and BASI

What programming language do they use in Star Wars?

JawaScript

Trial Jokes More Trial Jokes

Why was the photo acquitted in his trial at court?

Because he was framed!

Why did the picture plead innocent at the trial?

It was framed.

Submarine Jokes More Submarine Jokes

What is hard, long, and full of seamen?

A submarine

What's long, hard, and full of seamen?

A submarine.