Object Jokes

Why do objects disappear when you move them twice?

Because you remove them.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What is the only man made object visible from space?

Holland.

What is the difference between a robot and a sandwich?

Everything. These two objects have nothing in common.

What object crashes the most?

A kaleidoscope!

Why did got object to the wedding between the catholic man and the catholic woman?

He doesn't approve of same sect marriage

What do you call the object Attila the Hun uses to brush his leg hair?

A Hun knee comb.

What's the difference between a heroine and heroin?

One's an object that's easily abused, the other's a drug.

What type of objects do not accelerate, regardless of the force applied?

Letterhead and envelopes. No matter how hard you try, they remain stationery!

How does a frog fasten two objects together?

Rivets.

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Space Jokes More Space Jokes

Why did Mickey Mouse take a trip into space ?

He wanted to find Pluto !

Why wasn't the astronaut paying attention?

Because he was spaced out.

Practice Jokes More Practice Jokes

Why are emo people so good at ping-pong?

Because they are well practiced in cutting.

What type music should you practice before doing something dangerous?

Safety measures.

Attila Jokes More Attila Jokes

Who's there ! Attila ! Attila who ?

Attila you no lies !

What do you call the object Attila the Hun uses to brush his leg hair?

A Hun knee comb.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between the first and last desk of a viola section?

A: Half a measure.

Whats The difference between Stealing Cookies from a Jar and Child Molesting?

Ive only ever been caught stealing cookies.

Riot Jokes More Riot Jokes

What do you call a riot in Baltimore?

Target practice.

What's a riot?

Three dyslexics.

Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

What did the doctor do after he finished reading the book?

He removed the appendix!

What is the best place for politicians?

Election posters. There they are portable, silent and easy to remove.

Approve Jokes More Approve Jokes

Why did got object to the wedding between the catholic man and the catholic woman?

He doesn't approve of same sect marriage

What did the guy in China say to the Chinese couple who finally got approved to adopt?

Con-grab-ur-asians!!

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

How many surrealist painters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Fish. I got this from bash.org a long time ago, but I can't find the original post, so have this

What do you call a fish with no eyes ?

Fish !