Pretzel Jokes

What does a guy from Philly dunk his pretzel in?

a girl from Jersey.

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What did the detective say when he tripped over a pretzel left by the perp?

Well, that was an unexpected twist!

How do you like it?

Me: Salty...of course *slaps down $20 CG: We'll take two pretzels with salt Get outta the gutter pervs

What do you call a pretzel with roofies in it?

Forget-me-knots!

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Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What is a Farmer's favorite pick-up line?

Girl. You look so good that I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all!

What do you call a girl who stands in the middle of a tennis court?

Annette.

Outta Jokes More Outta Jokes

How do you like it?

Me: Salty...of course *slaps down $20 CG: We'll take two pretzels with salt Get outta the gutter pervs

What did the one electron say to the other when it asked it out on a date?

Get outta here, I'm not attracted to you!

Course Jokes More Course Jokes

What is large and grey and shoots tourists in Africa?

An elefanatic, of course.

Where do they weigh whales?

At the whale weigh station of course.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What do Worf and Jadzia like to do to relax?

Netflix and Trill!

A grocery store cashier asked if I would like my milk in a bag.

I told her 'No, thanks. The carton works fine.'

Trip Jokes More Trip Jokes

Who did the ghost-boy write to during his trip to ghost-summercamp?

There is no afterlife.

What happened to the hippy chemistry teacher when he spilled his chemicals?

He tripped on acid

Detective Jokes More Detective Jokes

How does a detective stay cool in hot summer?

He works on a cold case.

What do you call two detectives tracking down a ghost?

Pair-a-normal investigators.

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

Who, me?

Oh, just living the dream. You know, that one where you forget to wear clothes to work.

Who's there/9-11/9-11 who?

YOU SAID YOU'D NEVER FORGET!

Jersey Jokes More Jersey Jokes

How does a bull stay warm on a bitterly cold day in January?

He goes into the barn and slips into a warm Jersey.

How does a bull stay warm on a bitterly cold day?

A: He goes into the barn and slips into a nice warm Jersey.