Promote Jokes

What do you call promoting a broom to the highest rank in the military?

A Sweeping Generalization.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What do you call a Mexican on a riding lawnmower?

Promoted.

Why did the scarecrow get promoted?

Because he was outstanding in his field.

Why did Bill go out to sea on an aircraft carrier?

A: To promote off-shore drilling.

Why is it good to post jokes about feminists?

It promotes equality.

Why was the hot teacher promoted to principal?

Because she was the Headmaster! My first submitted joke :)

What do you call a Mexican on a RIDING lawn mower?

Promoted

What did the Mexican carpeting salesman yell to promote his business?

Underlay! Underlay!

How can you tell Cap'n Crunch is terrible?

He hasn't been promoted since 1963...

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Bill Jokes More Bill Jokes

What do Hillary and Bill have in common?

Both got screwed out of office

What do Monica Lewinsky and a soda machine have in common?

They both say insert Bill here

Broom Jokes More Broom Jokes

What happens next?

The broom gets sweepy.

What noise does a witch make when she's flyin around?

BROOM BROOM BROOOOOOOM

Underlay Jokes More Underlay Jokes

What kind of flooring does a Mexican fit?

Underlay! Underlay!

What do Mexican's put under their carpet?

Underlay

Yesterday Jokes More Yesterday Jokes

Who ever said time cannot be bought?

I bought some thyme yesterday.

Who is your best friend?

Robert" "Since when is Robert your best friend " "Yesterday."

Promotion Jokes More Promotion Jokes

Why did you call off yesterday?

Me: You said I should do what's best for the company. Boss.... Me: I'll take that promotion now.

Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?

Because he was outstanding in his field

Ride Jokes More Ride Jokes

What did the snail say when he was riding on the back of the turtle?

Weeeeeeeeee

Why couldn't Tommy ride a bicycle?

A: Because he was a gold fish.

Yell Jokes More Yell Jokes

What does a flower in a race car yell?

Petal to the nettle!

Why did the little pig hide the soap?

He heard the farmer yell "Hogwash!"

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell who's the head nurse at a hospital?

It's the one who has knee pads on.

What' the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef, but not everyone can pea soup. (As told by my 8yo, who made me laugh with a joke for the first time. Proud dad moment.)