Steven Hawking Jokes

Who has the fastest brain in the world?

Steven Hawking with a brake failure!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Coffee Mug

How does Steven Hawking refresh after a long work day?

F5 (sorry Imgoingtohellforthis)

What has a tongue, cannot walk, but gets around a lot?

Steven Hawking

Why does Steven Hawking hate the band Muse?

Because he can't stand their song Uprising, it wants him to rise up and take the power back.

Why do kids hate Steven Hawking?

They don't like their vegetables.

What's black and sits at the top of a staircase?

Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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Wheelchair Jokes More Wheelchair Jokes

What's the hardest part to cook in a vegetable ?

The wheelchair

Which part of a vegetable isn't edible?

His wheelchair.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Want to hear my pizza joke?

Never mind, it's too cheesy.

Why did the chicken cross the road half way ?

He wanted to lay it on the line !

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What do you call the queue of Software Engineers standing outside Heaven ?

The Y2K deadline !

What did the double-amputee say when he stood up?

I stand corrected." -From

Song Jokes More Song Jokes

What song does a car radio play?

A cartoon (car tune).

What's the last thing a drummer says in a band?

Hey guys, why don't we try one of my songs "

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

How, you ask?

I walked into an autopsy. It was stiff.

How does Harry Potter travel about?

Walking -Jk Rolling

Power Jokes More Power Jokes

What do you call a nuclear-powered car?

A mobile-Chernobyl!

What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?

When the power goes off.

Rise Jokes More Rise Jokes

What's better than a rose on your piano?

Tulips on your organ EDIT: This blew up. (No pun intended)

What happens to the water level in the aquarium when one of the fish dies?

It rises because the rest of the fishes are crying :'(

World Jokes More World Jokes

What's the sharpest thing in the world?

A fart. It goes through your pants without even making a hole.

What would someone in the 13 hundreds say if you told them we fly in giant metal birds all around the world?

You mean across