Suspend Jokes

What do you get if you cross a woman with a whale?

Your research funding suspended and a severe reprimand from the ethics committee.

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Why was Selena Gomez suspended in elementary school?

Because she couldn't keep her hands to herself.

What's the difference between US Politics and WWE?

one is a predetermined charade that takes a tremendous amount of willingness to suspend disbelief the other is pro wrestling.

Why didn't they punish the student who hung himself?

He was already suspended.

Why did Darth Vader get suspended from the Police?

He was under investigation for excessive use of Force

Why didn't Jesus play during the Isreal-Palestine soccer game?

He got suspended.

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Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why don't women wear skirts in the winter?

Ever try and peel apart a cold grilled cheese sandwich

What do you think astronauts wear to keep warm?

Girl: Apollo neck jumpers

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

How do French girls hold their liquor?

By the ears

Why was the robber bionic?

He was holding up a bank.

Politic Jokes More Politic Jokes

What's the difference between organized crime and politics?

One's organized.

What do you call disabled people that follow politics?

A special interest group.

Belt Jokes More Belt Jokes

Why did the belt get locked up?

A: He held up a pair of pants.

Why did the belt go to prison?

He held up a pair of pants!

Darth Vader Jokes More Darth Vader Jokes

Why was Darth Vader so upset?

He was looking for the Rebels in Aldeerwrong places...

What is Darth Vader's least favorite band?

Faith No More

Selena Gomez Jokes More Selena Gomez Jokes

Why the rabbits love Selena Gomez?

im farting carrots, im farting carrots...

Why was Selena Gomez suspended in elementary school?

Because she couldn't keep her hands to herself.

Whale Jokes More Whale Jokes

How do you weigh a whale?

On Whale Weigh Scales.

What does a lifeguard and a manager of a Curves have in common?

They both watch whales.

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

How does a pair of pants feel when it is ironed?

A: Depressed.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Incase he got a hole in one. HEHE one of my favs. Whats your fav joke?