Violate Jokes

What' is a pirate's least favourite letter?

Dear Sir, We are writing to you because you have violated copyright ...

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What happens if you violate Reddit's content policy?

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What happens when you violate Reddit's rules?

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What do laws and virgins have in common?

They're both there to be violated. (The sad part is that a Portuguese Taxi Driver actually said that seriously in a protest against Uber)

How do you say hello to a femnist?

You don't. To do so would violate her wish to not be part of the society she lives in.

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Ticket Jokes More Ticket Jokes

What's the worst way to convince an officer who's pulled you over not to ticket you?

You can have my beer if you let me go."

Who wants two tickets to the gun show?

I bought the Groupon but can't make it :(

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

What do you call a teeth specialist who writes books?

An author-dontist Wahey!

What's the difference between Bill Cosby and Lena Dunham?

Lena Dunham wrote the book about it.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

How do you get two rednecks to play Banjo in unison?

Shoot the first one.

Why did they have to stop playing water-polo in Poland?

All the horses drowned

Uber Jokes More Uber Jokes

What did the sarcastic taximan say when he lost his job?

Oh well that's just uber, isn't it

What do you call a white guy with 2 black guys in the back of the car?

The police. What do you call a black guy with 2 white guys in the back of the car Uber!

Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

What's the biggest similarity between a bottle of Draino and a Danish stripper?

They both slowly remove clogs.

What do liquid Draino and a Dutch stripper have in common?

They both slowly remove clogs. I'll see myself out... Hey, at least it was original. Thanks for the gold !

Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

Why did the strawberry cry?

Because his mother was in a jam.

What's the difference between a baby and an onion?

I cry when I chop an onion.

Viola Jokes More Viola Jokes

What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

A: Everyone is happy when the case is closed.

What did the violin say when it finally played the music correctly?

Viola.

Policeman Jokes More Policeman Jokes

What do you call a policeman on fire?

Bacon.

What do you call a policeman with a thing for MLP?

A clop cop.