Wednesday Jokes

How Do Priests Get High?

Snorting the left over ashes from Ash Wednesday...

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Why wasn't the coup in Turkey on Wednesday?

Erdogan's suit wasn't back from the cleaners.

What is Mr. T's nickname for Wednesday?

A: Chump day.

What's the best day of the week to marry your gaming console?

Wednesday

How do you make a blonde laugh on a Wednesday?

Tell her a joke on a Monday!

Why was the virgins' wedding during the middle of the week?

Because Wednesday is hump day.

Why did the Addams have the late man arrested?

He was expected on Tuesday, but he came on Wednesday.

How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?

Tell her a joke on Wednesday!

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Monday Jokes More Monday Jokes

Why do physicists have such a hard time figuring out why their experiments fail Monday through Thursday?

Causal fridays.

Why are you all so excited it's Friday?

Monday will be here in 5 minutes.

Coup Jokes More Coup Jokes

What happened when Turkey was accused of being Chicken?

It staged a coup

What's the difference between a Dove and a Turkey?

One has a coo, the other has a coup

Saturday Jokes More Saturday Jokes

Why don't the post office get the Jehovah's Witnesses to deliver the mail on Saturday?

Work smarter not harder people.

What is the dirtiest day of the week?

SaTURDay

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

What do bad photographs and the Irish famine have in common?

Potato quality

Why do the Irish have 239 beans in their soup?

If they had one more it would be to farty

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you find a vegan at your dinner party?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

What kind of stories does Eli Whitney tell on Easter?

Cottontales

Sunday Jokes More Sunday Jokes

What do you give a cannibal late for Sunday lunch?

The cold shoulder

How are the Oakland Raiders like the mailman?

Neither one delivers on Sunday!

Snort Jokes More Snort Jokes

What kind of drugs do ducks take?

The snort quack.

How Do Priests Get High?

Snorting the left over ashes from Ash Wednesday...

Expect Jokes More Expect Jokes

Who remembers the 2016 presidential race?

Nobody expected that late run from Gonzalez, did they?

Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is?

Pupil: I expect it's around Hadrian's garden miss!