How do you stop a baby from crawling round in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop an F4 tornado from destroying a town?

A roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris! However, this method will cause more destruction than the tornado.

How was work?

flashback to me being asked to leave the meeting because I couldn't stop giggling after someone said "abreast" me:Good

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why didn't Jesus like to play hockey?

He didn't like getting nailed to the boards.

Why are your nails painted two different colors?

Daughter: Dad. It's an accent color. Dad: ... Dad: Can I hear it

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why does Jesus hate M&Ms?

They keep falling through his hands.

What do you call someone from Zimbabwe holding a bottle cap in their hand?

A trillionaire.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What do you call a cow that just had a baby?

Decalfinated

What's the difference between a pitbull and a social worker?

You might get your baby back off a pitbull.

Round Jokes More Round Jokes

What do you say when an episode of explosive diarrhoea turns into a round of smooth poop?

What a wondrous *turd* of events.

What's red and green and spins round &amp round &amp round?

A frog in a blender.

Circle Jokes More Circle Jokes

How does a one armed man row a boat?

In a circle.

How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

Floor Jokes More Floor Jokes

What sound does a pubic hair make right before it hits the floor?

Ptui"

What's the highest story of any building?

Floor 20

Crawl Jokes More Crawl Jokes

How'd you sleep?

Him: *texts* Horrible...I was tossing and turn- Me: *crawls out from under his bed* I KNOW, YOU POOR THING.

Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?

A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "don't walk".