How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

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Garden Jokes More Garden Jokes

What happened when the man fell in love with his garden?

It made him wed his plants!

What did the reindeer wear to protect itself while Santa was watering the garden?

Rudolph's red hose rain gear...

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What is the biggest difference between Tiger Woods and Santa?

Santa stops at three Ho's

Why did they stop the leper hockey game?

There was a face off in the corner.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Who knocks on doors at three in the morning?

It's so inconsiderate! Good thing I was still up playing my bagpipes.

How does a lawyer from Panama play his guitar?

He shreds.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why didn't George like driving through tunnels with people in his car?

He didn't want to get carpool tunnel syndrome.

What do you call it when you spill your morning drive-through beverage on your virus scan software?

Getting McCafe on McAfee

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

What has eighteen legs and fetches a ball?

The Philadelphia Beagles!

What happened when the cat ate a ball of wool ?

She had mittens !

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

Why can't leopards hide?

Because they are always spotted!

What do you call a black guy at college?

A miracle. Edit: I've hidden this post as I realized it was stupid and too offensive. I'm sorry, it was overly racist.

Football Jokes More Football Jokes

What's the difference between the Friendzone and the Endzone?

Unlike football, you'll never get to spike it in the Friendzone.

What position does the pig play in football?

Loinback.

Squirrel Jokes More Squirrel Jokes

Why is a psychiatrist like a squirrel?

Because they are both surrounded by nuts.

What is a Squirrels favorite joke?

A-corny joke.