How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

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Garden Jokes More Garden Jokes

What do ladies-of-the-night do when in their garden?

They hoe it.

How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did the cold war last so long?

The US couldn't stop Stalin.

How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?

Shoot before he hits the water.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What did the pope say to Aretha Franklin?

I said play pope music not pop music.

What is a black guy's favorite game to play with the kids?

Peekaboo.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

How come a man driving a train got struck by lightning?

He was a good conductor.

What did the pirate say when he had a steering wheel down his pantaloons?

Arr! It's driving me nuts!

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

What is big and red and rolls over in the snow?

Santa Claus hit in the balls!

Why were my balls wet?

cause i dipped em' in the wishing well! LOL

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

What do Anne Frank and Bin Laden have in common?

They're both hide and seek champions!

How can working with cow hide help on a first date?

As if she's going to lay there and be swayed by some new buck.

Football Jokes More Football Jokes

Whats an Italians favourite part of football?

Half time, they get to switch sides again

When fish play football who is the captain ?

The team's kipper !

Squirrel Jokes More Squirrel Jokes

What is a Squirrels favorite joke?

A-corny joke.

Who run da world?

points mic at me* ME: having briefly heard the song once before ...squirrels