How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

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Garden Jokes More Garden Jokes

How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

What kind of gardening is done in the hood?

Weeding

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did the photon stop drinking after traveling 670 million miles?

because Happy Hour ended.

Why didn't you talk to me about renting a bouncy house?

me stops jumping: You would have said no

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What do you call a British person playing a saxophone?

An Anglo Saxin'

What position do u play?

ME: I'm a *thinks back to the only game I watched* wide-retriever.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What car do rich black people drive?

A Countach

Why Russians never drive stick shift?

They really hate Stalin

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

What do you call a dog that has balls of steel and is dragging them across cement?

A: Sparky.

What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common?

Their balls are just for decoration

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

What's the difference between a woman and a man?

A woman will buy something on sale even if she doesn't need it. A man will buy something he needs at full price. Then, what is the difference between a black woman and a black man? The black woman will steal something she doesn't need. The black man goes to jail because you can't hide diapers under a shirt.

Why do elephants paint their toenails red?

So they can hide in strawberry patches.

Football Jokes More Football Jokes

Where do people in Ghana go to watch football?

The Ghanarena

Why were the flies playing football in saucer ?

They where playing for the cup !

Squirrel Jokes More Squirrel Jokes

What animal do psychiatrists bring in to mental hospitals to help patients with social anxiety?

Squirrels they're the best at getting nuts out of their shells.

How are a piano and a squirrel alike?

They both aren't artichokes