How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

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Garden Jokes More Garden Jokes

What do you call an Irish man who lives in your back garden?

Patti O'Furniture

What do you can an epileptic What do you call an epileptic in a garden?

Seizure salad. edit: fixed the word 'call'

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop bad singing?

A pitchfork

Why did the masochist STOP hitting himself on the head with a hammer ?

Because it hurt.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

How does Dracula keep fit?

He plays batminton.

Why are people afraid to play poker in Africa?

Too many Cheetahs.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why are you so happy?

Girl2: I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that said "Parking Fine"

How do bulls drive their cars?

They steer them!

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

Why was Cinderalla thrown out of the football team?

Because she ran away from the ball.

What do you call balls on the wall?

Walnuts. What do you call balls on a chest Chestnuts. What do you call balls on a chin My throne

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

What do turtles do for fun?

Play hide and shell.

Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek?

Because he was always spotted.

Football Jokes More Football Jokes

What's the first sign of football in the bible?

Jesus going up for the cross!

Why did the feminist sign up for football?

She wanted to be the center of attention.

Squirrel Jokes More Squirrel Jokes

Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb?

Because, they're so darn stupid!

What part of "No" don't you understand?

Probably the whole thing I'm guessing. It's a pretty short word. What You're a squirrel Sorry