3 Year Old Jokes

Why do men carry condoms instead of women?

Because by the time women found a condom in their purses, kid would be 3 years old

This joke may have profanity.

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What colour is eight?

Purple (According to my 3 year old son)

Why did the 3 year old go to jail?

For resisting a rest.

What did I do in my 3-year-old?

I ate sand.

What's wrong ?

3-year-old: NOTHING! Phew! she's already a woman :-o

Why are you always tired, Dad?

my 3-year-old asked as she woke me from a nap by poking me in the eye.

What sound do dogs make?

3-year-old: Woof woof. Me: Horses 3: Neigh. Me: Pigs 3: Sizzle sizzle. Somebody understands bacon.

When I was 3 years old I looked at my nutsack and asked my Mom "Are these my brains?

Not yet," she replied

What does that cloud look like to you?

3-year-old: A cloud. Me: No, what do you imagine it could be 3-year-old: Rain.

What did you do at preschool?

3-year-old: We had to color inside the lines the WHOLE time. Me: 3-year-old: I need to lie down.

Why does the house only have one window?

Cheeseburger (joke from my 3 year old neice this evening)

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What did you get me for Mother's Day?

3-year-old: A cake. Wife: Where is it 3: You haven't made it yet.

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Line Jokes More Line Jokes

What do you call people waiting in line for Vietnamese soup?

Pho queue.

What was the last line in Anne Frank's diary?

Just a moment, someone's knocking on the door..

Imagine Jokes More Imagine Jokes

Why did this OkCupid user never go out on a date?

A. "I couldn't imagine a date could be interested in knowing about me more than this website"

What do you call am alligator in a vest?

An illogical situation imagined by a child.

Jail Jokes More Jail Jokes

Why did the picture go to jail?

Because it was framed

Why was the paper man sent to jail?

He was caught rustling.

Horse Jokes More Horse Jokes

Where should I put this horse?

When she tells you, say no

How'd he do it?

The horses name was Friday.

Cheeseburger Jokes More Cheeseburger Jokes

Why did the cheeseburger fight the veggie burger?

It had beef.

What do some people have against cheeseburgers?

They say 'Burgers can't be cheesy!'

Purple Jokes More Purple Jokes

How do you confuse a retard?

Say "purple".

What's the difference in red and purple...?

How hard you squeeze it.

Preschool Jokes More Preschool Jokes

What's the difference between a preschool and a terrorist training camp?

Don't ask me...I just fly the drones!

Whats the difference between a preschool and a taliban camp?

I don't know man. I just fly the drones.

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What's green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?

A girl scout that got hit by a car.

What do you call a man who thinks women are easy to lie to?

Deceased