Captain America Jokes

Why does Black Widow love sitting on Captain America's shield?

Because it's made out of vibranium.

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Why wasn't there a Captain America movie tie in videogame?

Because every time one bug was fixed, 2 more appeared.

What do you get when you dress the Hulk in Captain America's clothes?

A Star-Spangled Banner.

What happens to Captain America when he dies?

He goes to the Evans

What Metallica song does Captain America hate?

Trapped Under Ice.

Who fought in the Civil War?

Millennial student: Captain America and Iron Man. T: ....

What would Captain America be called if he fought in Vietnam?

You weren't there man

What do you get when you cross Captain America and the Hulk?

A Star-Spangled Banner.

What is Captain America's shield made of?

Vibranium. What is Hawkeye's Shield made of **Quicksilver**

What do you get when you cross Captain America with The Incredible Hulk?

A star-spangled banner

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Bug Jokes More Bug Jokes

What do you say when German secret police is bugging you?

geSTAHPo!

What kind of bug wants to buy lawn turf?

A gras shopper.

Quicksilver Jokes More Quicksilver Jokes

What is Captain America's shield made of?

Vibranium. What is Hawkeye's Shield made of **Quicksilver**

What's Captain America's shield made out of?

What's Captain America's shield made of Vibranium. What's Hawkeye's shield made of Quicksilver.

T Jokes More T Jokes

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

How do you get an elephant in to a plastic bag?

First you take the 'T' out of 'Tesco', what do you get Esco. Then you take the 'F' out of 'Weigh', what do you get

Metallica Jokes More Metallica Jokes

What Metallica song does Captain America hate?

Trapped Under Ice.

What's your favorite song?

Me, to a baby wearing a Metallica shirt at the grocery store.

Vietnam Jokes More Vietnam Jokes

How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a light bulb?

You don't know cause you weren't there

Why did all most of the black soldiers die in Vietnam?

When the commander yelled "GET DOWN", they all started dancing.

Captain America Shield Jokes More Captain America Shield Jokes

What is Captain America's shield made of?

Vibranium. What is Hawkeye's Shield made of **Quicksilver**

What's Captain America's shield made out of?

What's Captain America's shield made of Vibranium. What's Hawkeye's shield made of Quicksilver.

Hawkeye Shield Jokes More Hawkeye Shield Jokes

What's Hawkeye's Shield Made Out Of?

Quicksilver

What is Captain America's shield made of?

Vibranium. What is Hawkeye's Shield made of **Quicksilver**

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What do snakes write on the bottom of their letters?

With love and hisses.

Why couldn't Princess Leia find love?

She was looking in Alderaan places.