Chocolate Jokes

What do you call it when a Physics Teacher throws a bar of chocolate at you?

Brownian Motion

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How do you sell chocolate to a deaf/foreign person?

WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY SOME CHOCOLATE?!

Why do women love chocolate?

Because it's the only time 'rich' and 'dark' are used to describe the same thing.

Which chocolate stops dogs hair falling out?

Malteasers

What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long?

A runny bunny.

Why can you trust chocolate but not marshmallow?

Because chocolate doesn't make a peep.

What do you get when you do laundry and accidentally leave chocolate in your pocket?

Lindt choclate.

What do you call Chewbacca when he has chocolate stuck in his hair?

A Chocolate Chip Wookiee.

What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?

A chocolate BAAA

How can you tell God is a man?

If God was a woman sperm would taste like chocolate

How is a speech impediment like a box of chocolates?

It doesn't really matter, as long as it has good cocoa content.

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What do you call it when you dip poultry and beef in chocolate?

Brown-chichen-Brown-cow

What type of fruit loves chocolate the most?

A Coconut.

What do a big bar of chocolate and a frag grenade have in common?

Everybody gets a piece.

What algorithm did Intel use in the Pentium's floating point divider?

Life is like a box of chocolates...

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Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you call a woman standing in the middle of at tennis court?

Annette!

What's the difference between a woman in the bath and a woman at church?

Well... the woman at church has hope in her soul.

Study Jokes More Study Jokes

What did Ferris Bueller do after he graduated high school?

He went to Europe to study a-Broderick

Why did the chicken say, "Meow, oink, bow-wow, moo?

He was studying foreign languages.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What did they say about the blind man who got hit by a bus?

He never saw it coming.

Where Are You Going ?

Me : Partying with Friends Pimple : Ok, I'm Also Coming then!!

Easter Eggs Jokes More Easter Eggs Jokes

How do you make a chocolate omelette?

With Easter Eggs!

Why can't you sniff out Easter Eggs?

In a tone like you have no idea) "No bunny nose" -Made up this morning in bed to a very dissatisfied girlfriend

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why does Sia live in a low-rent apartment?

She loves cheap bills

Which burgers love to act?

Ham-burgers!

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why should you never trust a one armed philosophy professor?

He never mentions "on the other hand"

Why cant you trust an atom?

Because they make up literally everything

Baaa Jokes More Baaa Jokes

What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?

A chocolate BAAA

What rating did Moody's give to the sheep?

BAAA

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

How do Eskimos make things stick together?

Igloo

Why have you got cotton wool in your ears do you have an infection ?

Pupil: Well you keep saying that things go in one ear and out the other so I am trying to keep them it all in!