Dad Joke Jokes

What is a dad joke?

Punchlines that got married and settled down.

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What do you call a dad joke in Jamaica?

Dreadful.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long?

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because his neck is way up here! (Dad Joke)

Why couldn't Mark think of a dad joke?

Mark is black.

What do you call the field of study for dad jokes?

ence

Where do Polar Bears keep their money?

In the Snowbank. My first post is a dad joke LOL

What do you call a guy who likes telling "dad jokes"?

A "groan" man...

What's the difference between Bad Jokes and Dad Jokes?

One starts with B and the otber starts with D

What do you call something that's impossible due to physics?

Physics-ly impossible. There's your dad joke for the day.

What does a snowman say to his son on his birthday?

dad joke) Happy Brr-day son!

What's the best part about living in a black family?

You never have to hear a dad joke. Edit. Just thought of this at work one day hope it's not a repost

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Where do salt lovers go to pray?

OC The taberNaCl. (Sorry..) (X-posted to dad jokes.)

What do dads never forget to include in their "dad" jokes?

PUNctuation Okay, I'll leave.

What's that difference between a pun and a dad joke?

Dad jokes are punnier.

Why do they call "roach-clips", "roach-clips"?

because potholder was already taken. I know it's like a venn diagram of drug jokes and dad jokes.

What is the one thing batman and superman don't have to worry about?

Dad Jokes.

What do you call a Mexican melon?

A cantelopez! Came up with this on all by myself. I'm a new Dad, so I feel as if I've significantly leveled up my Dad Joke ability.

When does a joke become a dad joke?

When it becomes apparent.

Why are “Dad Jokes” so good?

Because the punchline is apparent.

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Settle Jokes More Settle Jokes

Why do Native Americans hate snow?

Because it's white and settles on their land

How was my engagement the same as my divorce?

In the end, I settled.

Response Jokes More Response Jokes

What do you call someone who can't find a job?

A Psych major. (Pls list your own response - if you're awake and in America at this time, you should have a pretty good one). Thanks.

Where have you learned aiming?

Response: In programming course.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a Texan and a redneck?

Texans tend to ride horses whereas rednecks ride their cousins. -American Sniper

What's the difference between Russian football fans and an old drunkard in a bar at closing time?

Kicking the old drunkard out won't start world war III.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination?

A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I told them nothing."

What did the policeman say when he was told about the large pothole?

I'll look into it."

D Jokes More D Jokes

Why does Edward Woodwood have four D's in his name?

Because otherwise his name would be E-war Woo-woo.

What is the difference between a laddie and a lady?

One has a d where the other doesn't.

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

What does Snoop Dogg do when he forgets to put on oven mitts?

He drops it like it's hot.

Who?

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? I thought you said you would never forget!

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What did the sun say after melting Frosty the Snowman?

I came, I thaw, I conquered .

Why is six afraid lf seven?

Because seven just came back from a trip to West Africa.

3 Jokes More 3 Jokes

What has 6 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet?

The Boston marathon finish line.

Why did the 3-legged dog go back to Dodge City?

To see who shot his "paw."