Masterbate Jokes

What did the masterbating Australian mortician do?

Cremate

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

What do you call a cow masterbating?

Beef stroganoff

What sound does a baby make when you put it in a microwave?

I don't know....I was too busy masterbating.

What do you call 100 cows masterbating ?

Beef Strokenoff

What do you call a rapper who masterbates a lot?

Lil Wayne-ker

Why does Helen Keller only masterbate with one hand?

She needs the other to moan.

What do you call a masterbating cow?

Beef stroganoff

Why did Helen Keller masterbate with one hand?

So she could moan with the other XD

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Helen Keller Jokes More Helen Keller Jokes

Why did Helen Keller stop cleaning her dishes?

She was running out of things to read.

What did Helen Keller say when she won the lottery?

uunnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggg!

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why do you need all this syrup?

The government worker says: "That's mollasified."

What are your intentions with our daughter?

Uh I need someone to sing the girl parts of Grease songs with me

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What's the difference between a psychotic mental patient and a man with a bible in his hand?

Respiridol

How did pinocchio find out that he was made out of wood?

His hand caught fire.

Microwave Jokes More Microwave Jokes

What sound does a baby make when you put it in a microwave?

I don't know....I was too busy masterbating.

How do you cook vegatables in the microwave ?

Take them out their wheelchair.

Cremate Jokes More Cremate Jokes

Why did so many people show up to see the cannibal get cremated?

His family advertised it as a barbecue.

Why did the man with bronchitis get cremated..?

he was tired of coffin.

Xd Jokes More Xd Jokes

Why are 490 Romans funny?

Because XD

Why did the roman only smoke 490 blunts and not 500?

Because XD

Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What kind of magic do cows believe in?

MOODOO.

What happens when the cows refuse to be milked?

Udder chaos!

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

What do you call a lot of cactus?

A cac-ton

How do you manage to stay in shape?

Witch 2: "I get a lot of hexercise."