New Home Jokes

What's the difference between a woman and a gun?

Guns don't move out when you bring a new one home.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

What's really important to a bat when they are looking for a new home?

Echo-location, location, location (Replace "bat" with "zubat" if you wish.)

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Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

How do four whores sit on one chair?

They turn it over.

Why are popcorn just like people?

Everything is fine as long as they are white, it is when they turn black it starts to be a problem.

Lame Jokes More Lame Jokes

What do these shoes do?

GLINDA: Send you home D: Lame tries new pair And these G: Wait- D: clicks heels turns into hamburger

How do you call a joke that is not funny?

Lame.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What do you call a snobby thief running down your stairs?

A condescending con descending.

What is the ardent task of searching for a new wallpaper called?

Running a Backgroud Check.

Porpoise Jokes More Porpoise Jokes

Why did the lone dolphin stop swimming?

He didn't see a porpoise...

What did the dolphin say to the other dolphin after he splashed him?

Hey! You did that on porpoise!"

D Jokes More D Jokes

Why did the blonde wear green lipstick?

Because red means stop D

Why was the lesbian mad when she got her report card?

Cause she got a D

Gun Jokes More Gun Jokes

How do you tell if someone online is American?

They keep their caps locked and guns loaded. (Not the best and not original)

What's the difference between a woman and a gun?

Guns don't move out when you bring a new one home.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What makes Stevie wonder?

What everything looks like.

Why use words you don't understand in your tweets?

It just makes you look photosynthesis.

Location Jokes More Location Jokes

What is your location?

Me: And you're to blame 911: Pardon Me: You give love a bad name 911: I'm hanging up

What's the difference between a Hoover and a Harley?

The location of the dirtbag.