Place Jokes

What would Dorothy have said if she practiced Yoga instead of new age magical thinking?

There's no place like OM.

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What is Nitrate?

Girl: My place, 250...your place 400!

How do you know if an Asian is depressed?

All around them are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces.

What is a crowbar?

A: A place were crows go to get a drink!

What did one horny whale say to the other?

Wanna humpback at my place

This joke may have profanity.

How is lightning like a violist's fingers?

A: Neither one strikes in the same place twice.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

1 to hold the bulb in place and 100 to spin the house around it.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do zombies use to prepare their turkeys for cooking on the smoker?

Briiiiines...

Why did the redditor stand on a piece of fruit to check his weight?

BECAUSE HE WAS USING A BANANA FOR SCALE

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

What is yellow, fluffy, and hides your slippers?

A Labrador Deceiver.

How many Sand People does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

No one knows. They ride single file to hide their numbers.

Olympic Jokes More Olympic Jokes

How many armed men does it take to extort an Olympic athlete?

A Brazilian.

Why does Mexico never win the Olympics?

Because anyone who can run, jump, or swim already left.

Cowboy Jokes More Cowboy Jokes

What time do werewolf Cowboys have a shootout?

High Moon!

What happened to the cowboy when he said that he was sick of washing cowhides at his side of the dairy?

He was sent to the udder side

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

What did the new KKK member say during his training?

Hey, I'm getting the hang of it!"

Why do Demons and Ghouls hang out together?

Because Demons are a Ghouls best friend.

App Jokes More App Jokes

What do you call a seagull that lives by the Bay?

I don't know, but it won't shut up about the app it's developing.

How about an app that keeps track of every working automatic paper towel dispenser in the world?

All seven or eight of them.

North Korean Jokes More North Korean Jokes

What's the difference between regular AIDS and north korean AIDS?

Regular AIDS is incurable. North Korean AIDS is invincible!

What do you call a North Korean Gorilla?

King Kong Un (From my younger brother).

Touchdown Jokes More Touchdown Jokes

What's the safest place in Dallas during a tornado?

The Cowboys stadium, the only place there'll never be a touchdown

When is the NFL going to start drafting players with mental handicaps?

Have you ever seen a video of them getting the ball and not scoring a touchdown