Place Jokes

What would Dorothy have said if she practiced Yoga instead of new age magical thinking?

There's no place like OM.

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What is Nitrate?

Girl: My place, 250...your place 400!

How do you know if an Asian is depressed?

All around them are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces.

What is a crowbar?

A: A place were crows go to get a drink!

What did one horny whale say to the other?

Wanna humpback at my place

This joke may have profanity.

How is lightning like a violist's fingers?

A: Neither one strikes in the same place twice.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

1 to hold the bulb in place and 100 to spin the house around it.

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Good Place Jokes More Good Place Jokes

Where's the best place to go if you want a little head?

The 2016 Olympics.

Where is the best place to hide a hippie's weed?

Under the soap.

250 Jokes More 250 Jokes

What is Nitrate?

Girl: My place, 250...your place 400!

How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.

Touchdown Jokes More Touchdown Jokes

How do you get a touchdown at Penn State?

Introduce a boy with Down's Syndrom to Jerry Sandusky.

What's the safest place in Dallas during a tornado?

The Cowboys stadium, the only place there'll never be a touchdown

Dallas Jokes More Dallas Jokes

What Do you call 20 Millionaires watching the Superbowl?

The Dallas Cowboys

What's the safest place in Dallas during a tornado?

The Cowboys stadium, the only place there'll never be a touchdown

Tornado Jokes More Tornado Jokes

What do a Redneck divorcee and a Tornado have in common?

either way, you're gonna lose your trailer...

What's the difference between a tornado and a redneck divorce?

Nothing. Either way they're losing the trailer.

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side?

ah wait, i can't remember the rest :/

Why do they put cotton in the top of pill bottles?

So black people remember they were cotton pickers before they were drug dealers.

Device Jokes More Device Jokes

What did one device say to the other?

A: Are you syncing what I"m syncing

What device does Mario use to communicate with the dead?

A Lou-ouija board.

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

What goes stomp, stomp, stomp, squish?

An elephant with a wet boot

When do elephants have eight feet?

When there are two of them.