What did the two story house say to its friend after it had just finished working out, and it's friend invited I to a party?

I'm two tiered. I came up with this at 1am, enjoy.

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What do Swedish criminals say when the cops are coming?

Pork! Pork! Pork!

What did the raisin see when she came home early from work?

Her husband on a date.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why do laxatives always say 'Works gently, overnight'?

What if I want something that works violently right now "

Why were Democrats in the lead early on?

Republicans weren't off of work yet.

Finish Jokes More Finish Jokes

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?

Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.

What do the racehorse that finished in second and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both came in a little behind.

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

Why can't there be some sort of mathematic formula for making friends?

A squadratic formula, if you will.

What did the maggot say to his friend when he got stuck in an apple ?

Worm your way out of that one !

1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

What are the three kinds of women's cancer?

1. Breast Cancer 2. Ovarian Cancer 3. Feminism

Why is Jeopardy the #1 show in the U.S.?

Because Michael Douglas starred in "Double Jeopardy" in 1999.

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all of your alcohol?

Invite two of them.

What do you do after you but a new oven?

Invite all of your friends over and have an oven warming party.

Enjoy Jokes More Enjoy Jokes

How are you supposed to buy a gift for your mom as an adult?

It's like, oh you gave birth to me Please enjoy this fancy candle.

What do you get when you cross an ape with a calculator?

A Hairy Reasoner. (Andy Rooney used to enjoy this one)

Party Jokes More Party Jokes

What did the baby owl's parents say when he wanted to go to a party?

You're not owld enough.

Where do Cows go for parties?

The Moovies

Story House Jokes More Story House Jokes

Why do old people prefer to live in one story houses?

There close to the ground.

What did the two story house say to its friend after it had just finished working out, and it's friend invited I to a party?

I'm two tiered. I came up with this at 1am, enjoy.