Colleague Jokes

Why does Hannibal Lecter skin his colleagues?

He enjoys the taste of Doctors Without Borders.

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What did the perverted scientist say to his colleague?

If you need me, I'll be in my Lab.

What did the lumberjack say when his colleague went home sick?

Hope you fell better tomorrow.

Why did Einstein refuse to help people fix their cars?

Because his colleagues would call him the Quantum Mechanic.

What did the Headless Horseman ask his colleague at Bad Guys Inc.?

What do I have to do to get ahead around here?

What does a Mexican carpet fitter say to motivate his colleagues?

Underlay! Underlay!

What did the lead researcher say when all of her colleagues were complaining about the experiment?

I don't care et al."

Why didn't the scientist tell his colleague the t-value of a test with 21 degrees of freedom and a p-value of 5%?

It was a t-crit! Thank you and goodnight!

What did the scientist say after attacking his colleague with sodium chloride?

That's a salt!

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Taste Jokes More Taste Jokes

How do deer get revenge?

By giving each other a taste of their own venison

What does alcohol free beer taste like?

Like going down on your sister. It tastes the same but something's not right.

Jeremy Clarkson Jokes More Jeremy Clarkson Jokes

Why were Jeremy Clarkson's colleagues excited to try his mulled wine?

Because they'd been floored by his punch.

What do Amy Winehouse and Jeremy Clarkson have in common?

They were both on top gear.

Mexican Carpet Fitter Jokes More Mexican Carpet Fitter Jokes

What do you call a Mexican carpet fitter?

underlay underlay"

What does a Mexican carpet fitter say to motivate his colleagues?

Underlay! Underlay!

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

Why was 5 afraid of 7?

Because 6, 7 8.(http://www.reocities.com/Area51/Meteor/9836/yoda/yodafunface2.jpg)

What are 5 black people in a red car?

A KitKat.

Floor Jokes More Floor Jokes

What do you call a quadriplegic laying on the floor?

Matt.

How can you make money fast?

Glue it to the floor.

P Jokes More P Jokes

What did gangster Pooh said to gangster Tigger?

Tigga please!" Sorry, I heard it years ago. I don't remember where or when but I've just been saying alot lately. :p

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

The p is silent.

Physicist Jokes More Physicist Jokes

Why are quantum physicists the kinkiest of all scientists?

They have the ability to penetrate both holes at the same time. explanation(http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Double-slitexperiment)

Why did the physicist move across the street from the haunted graveyard?

To observe spooky action at a distance! Thank you, I'll be here all week.

Scientist Jokes More Scientist Jokes

What did the scientist say before he died by mixing Hydroxide and Nitrate?

OH NO !"

What does the scientist say when asked if Invisibility Cloak will be applicated by the military?

Yes, but you won't see it any time soon.