Congress Jokes

What bill is the Congress's favorite?

Of course the $ bill!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What's the opposite of progress?

congress.

How many US Congress members does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one. They just hold it still and wait for the world to revolve around them.

Whats the difference between congress and a US mint?

One of them makes sense!

Whats the difference between congress and parliament?

Ones filled with a bunch of baboons and the other just doesn't give a hoot during the day.

What's the difference between congress and a circus?

One is a Cunning array of Stunts...

What do you call a group of Idiots?

Congress

What is the opposite of pro?

Con. What is the opposite of progress Congress.

What's the difference between Personal Injury lawyers and Congress?

A: No fee--If No Recovery!

Why is Congress like a cold?

Because sometimes the ayes (eyes) have it and sometimes the no's (nose).

You might also enjoy:

Cunne Jokes More Cunne Jokes

What's the difference between congress and a circus?

One is a Cunning array of Stunts...

What's the difference between a gang of pygmy's and a women's track team?

One is a Cunning group of Runts.....

Con Jokes More Con Jokes

What's the opposite of pro?

Con. So what's the opposite of progress

What's a good thing about a novelist conman?

He may have a lot of cons, but he also has a lot of prose.

Cold Jokes More Cold Jokes

What's the coldest part of a man's body?

His balls. Two below.

How can you tell a vampire has a cold?

They start coffin.

World Jokes More World Jokes

How does a feminist change a lightbulb?

By holding the bulb up to the socket and waiting for the world to revolve around them.

Why isn't there a college in the world of Harry Potter?

Because even Magic can't pay your college Loan

Revolve Jokes More Revolve Jokes

How many Harvard graduates does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one. He holds up the light bulb, and the world revolves around him

How many feminists does it take screw in a lightbulb?

One she holds it in the socket and waited for the world to revolve around her.

Aye Jokes More Aye Jokes

What did Goku say when he heard his wife listening to the song, "Fancy"?

Aye, Chi-Chi, Why?

Why is Congress like a cold?

Because sometimes the ayes (eyes) have it and sometimes the no's (nose).

Bill Jokes More Bill Jokes

Why are ducks always sad?

Because of their bills

What was the real purpose of Bill's college visit to Moscow?

A: To study economics.

Fee Jokes More Fee Jokes

Which side is it best to lie on?

she asked. "The side that pays your fee" replied the doctor.

What is your fee?

Lawyer says: "1000 US dollars for 3 questions." Man: "Wow - so much! Isn't it a bit expensive " Lawyer: "Yes, what is your third question "