Defendant Jokes

What do you say to a black man in a suit?

Will the defendant please rise."

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What do you call a chav in a suit?

The defendant."

How do you plead?

Defendant: Not quilty.

What did the defendant say when he saw his picture hung up in the courtroom?

I've been framed.

What do you call a scouser in a suit?

The defendant.

What do you call a drummer in a three piece suit?

A: The defendant.

How do you find the defendant?

Jury Foreman: Well...I guess I just look right at him. Why -- isn't that how you do it

What did the judge say when the defendant cause a ruckus in vegetable court?

Bay leaf get him out if here!

What can you say in your defense?

ampndash Defendant! Stop clowning and sit down!

What do you call a gypsy in a suit?

The defendant

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A Sandyhook survivor...................im so sorry.

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What does a lawyer, a pine tree, and a hydrogen atom have in common?

Absolutely nothing.

What did the lawyer say after the short trial?

That was a brief case.

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What do French people say when they don't want to see someone ever again?

Au nevoir.

Why can't French people count to 5?

Because there's a in the way.

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Why can't America ever win a chess tournament?

Because they're missing two towers

Why aren't there any knock knock jokes about America?

Because Freedom Rings.

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What did Lil' Jon do when Home Depot employee tried to sell him a lightbulb?

Turned down 4 watt

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Me: No. My gf said we needed to talk

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Why is their always lightning in France?

Obviously, since lightning takes the path of least resistance.

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Why did the picture plead innocent at the trial?

It was framed.

What did the hamburger say when it pleaded 'not guilty'?

I've been flamed!