Hermione Jokes

Why do girls go to the bathroom in groups?

Hermione went alone and was attacked by a troll

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Why doesn't Hermione keep her money at Gringotts?

Offshore investment gains a better return.

Why was Harry Potter hufflepuffed after his date with Hermione?

She wouldn't let his ravenclaw slytherin her Gryffindor.

Why didn't Harry Potter want to date Hermione?

Because he likes to Hit it and Quidditch

What did Harry Potter say when he fell down the hill?

Ouch! I Hermione!"

What did Ron Weasley do the first time he saw Hermione naked?

He whipped out his wand and yelled, "***Shtupify***!".

What did ron say when he got Hermione pregnant?

Fetus deletus

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Ron Weasley Jokes More Ron Weasley Jokes

Why couldn't Ron Weasley make a Horcrux?

Because you need a soul for that.

What did Ron Weasley do the first time he saw Hermione naked?

He whipped out his wand and yelled, "***Shtupify***!".

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What is the difference between a beautiful dress and a bottle of Whisky?

A beautiful dress can make one girl look gorgeous... A bottle of whiskey can make all girls look gorgeous.

Why do girls go to the bathroom in groups?

Hermione went alone and was attacked by a troll

Harry Potter Jokes More Harry Potter Jokes

What does Harry Potter do when he gets Ginny Pregnant?

Cast Fetus Deletus.

Why is Harry Potter so popular?

The story grows on you.

Whip Jokes More Whip Jokes

Who needs whips and chains?

Christian should have had Ana read Fifty Shades of Grey if he wanted to torture her.

Why is Easter like whipped cream and a cherry?

Because it's always on a sundae!

Bathroom Jokes More Bathroom Jokes

What do you call the surveillance system that watches us all whilst we are in the bathroom?

the panoptijohn

Why do blonde girls go to the bathroom in groups of three?

Because they can't even

Group Jokes More Group Jokes

What do you call a reptile that loves putting things in groups?

a segreGATOR

What's the most wicked thing a group of young accountants can do?

Go into town and gang-audit someone.

Gain Jokes More Gain Jokes

Why do volleyball player want to join the armed forces?

For the chance to gain some experience in the service.

How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

How's someone just gonna fall asleep while committing a felony?

smh

Why did the half blind man fall in the well?

Because he couldn't see that well!