Israeli Jokes

What did the Israelite say to the american when offering him a drink?

Here, try this, Israeli refreshing!"

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How does Moses make his tea?

Hebrews it. I'm serious! That Israeli how he does it!

What do you call the Israeli PM when he switches search engines?

Benjamin Netangoogle

How do Israeli skiiers greet each other?

Shlalom! (Oy, that's terrible.)

What did the drunkard say when he walked into an Israeli bar?

Hebrews?

What did the Germans name the Israeli Submarine?

Das Jude

Why does it take so long to play Israeli sports?

Because all the replays are in shlomo.

What do you call an Israeli rooster?

A koke.

What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored?

A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.

What did the Israeli Prime Minister who can't say the word "and" say about candy that caused such a hubbub?

Mike Ike's are my least favorite.

What's an Israeli ghetto called?

Palestine.

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What do you get if you cross a dead Israeli leader with a New Age diet nut?

Menachem Vegan

What's the difference between an Israeli terrorist and a woman with PMS?

You can reason with the terrorist!

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Moses Jokes More Moses Jokes

What did Moses say when Isaiah told him the levy had burst?

God Dam It!

Why doesn't Moses buy beer?

He brews it.

Ra Mallah Jokes More Ra Mallah Jokes

Why are computers in Palestine really fast?

Because they've got Ramallah.

Why do Palestinians have faster computers than Israelis?

They have RAMallah.

Reason Jokes More Reason Jokes

What do feminists search for on scavenger hunts?

Reasons to be offended.

Why are 1980 pennies worth more than 1979 pennies?

Dads joke) The same reason 10 pennies is worth more than 9.

West Bank Jokes More West Bank Jokes

Where do terrorists store their money?

In the West Bank

What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored?

A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.

American Jokes More American Jokes

What can you find in both medieval English castles and American art museums?

Norman Rock Wells.

How do you call a person that speaks only one language?

An American

Tea Jokes More Tea Jokes

What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow?

Reality

What kind of tea do koalas drink?

Euca-lipton

Greet Jokes More Greet Jokes

How do you greet the cold horse across the fence?

Howdy Neigh - Brr Made up by my 4 year old son.

How do you greet a three-headed monster?

Hi, hi, hi.

Palestine Jokes More Palestine Jokes

What's an Israeli ghetto called?

Palestine.

Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?

A. The area around the Jordan. The banks were always overflowing.