Kim Kardashian Jokes

Why was Kim Kardashian arrested at the airport?

She had two pounds of crack in her knickers.

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What did Kim Kardashian's right leg say to her left leg?

Nothing, they've never been together!

What did the Los Angeles Lakers finish on tuesday?

Kim Kardashian's face.

What does Kanye West call Kim Kardashian when she has a yeast infection?

Yeasty I'll show myself out

What is the difference between your mom and Kim Kardashian?

One is a dirty whore and the other is Kim Kardashian.

This joke may have profanity.

What do Kim Kardashian, and my girlfriend have in common?

They're both made up.

What do Kim Kardashian and her dad have in common?

They both got famous for getting a black man off.

What do Kim Kardashian and Hurricane Sandy have in common?

They will both blow the entire east coast just to get on TV.

What's the difference between Einstein and Kim Kardashian?

Einstein is famous for special relativity, Kim is famous for simple reality tv.

What's the difference between Kim Kardashian and a homeless man who works at McDonalds?

One of those greasy bums is making a lot more money.

How did Kanye West ask Kim Kardashian to marry him ??

will i marry you?"

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What is Kim Kardashian's favorite hockey team?

The Chicago Blackhawks

How does Kim Kardashian like her eggs?

Over-Yeezy.

What do Hurricane Irene and Kim Kardashian have in common?

They blow the whole east coast and there's videos online.

What does Robert, Khloe, and Kim Kardashian all have in common?

They all know how to get black men off.

How did Kim Kardashian get her hands on Liberace's bath robe?

GrammysRedCarpet

What do you say when Kim Kardashian burns to the ground?

Look at all that ash...

What's the difference between Kim Kardashian and a colored wash?

Whites occasionally get inside a colored wash.

Whats Kim Kardashian and the Middle East got in common?

Both are covered in oil, huge, and been invaded by the West.

How did Kim Kardashian break the net?

She sat on it.

Why couldn't Kim Kardashian see Caitlyn Jenner?

Because she was trans-parent.

What do Hurricane Matthew and Kim Kardashian have in common?

They'll both blow the entire east coast just to get on TV

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East Coast Jokes More East Coast Jokes

What do Hurricane Irene and Kim Kardashian have in common?

They blow the whole east coast and there's videos online.

Why can't Russia extradite US top-secret whistle-blowers?

Because they're Snowden (snowed-in). To all the folks on the East coast, stay safe and warm.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

How do people look at the internet?

Me: How Him: With their google-y eyes

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

How do rain drops marry?

They coalesce

What is the worst joke you have ever Heard?

I'll start it off: Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

Irene Jokes More Irene Jokes

What do Hurricane Irene and Kim Kardashian have in common?

They blow the whole east coast and there's videos online.

What do you call an Asian woman with a leg shorter than the other?

Irene

Blow Jokes More Blow Jokes

What's better than a rose on your piano?

Tulips on your organ EDIT: This blew up. (No pun intended)

What do women and fuses have in common?

They blow when they get turned on.

Airport Jokes More Airport Jokes

What does a rock artist say to a jazz musician?

To the airport please

What did airport security tell the Dentist?

We need to give you a cavity search

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do Saddam Hussein and General Custer have in common ?

A: They both want to know where the hell those Tomahawks are coming from !

What do you get when you cross my mom with my dad?

I don't know, but my Dad said it was a mistake.

Black Man Jokes More Black Man Jokes

Why did the black man try to break into jail?

He wanted to be with his family.

How can you tell if a black man has been using your computer?

It won't be there