Marshmallow Jokes

Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow?

So that he didn't fall in the hot cocoa.

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Why was the marshmallow stuck to the tree?

It was taped.

What is the difference between camping and being homeless?

Marshmallows

Whats the difference between Zoidburg and Snowden?

both accused of treason for expressing their freedom but Zoidburg didn't get his marshmallows!

Why can you trust chocolate but not marshmallow?

Because chocolate doesn't make a peep.

How many marshmallows does it take to get to the moon?

Purple, there are no bones in ice cream!

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Inventor Jokes More Inventor Jokes

How can you tell the inventor of the toothbrush was from West Virginia?

If he was from anywhere else it would be called a teethbrush.

What's something that the inventor doesn't want, the buyer doesn't use, and the user doesn't know about it?

A casket

Melt Jokes More Melt Jokes

Why was the little black kid with diarrhea crying?

Because he thought he was melting.

What did water say when ice farted?

Ice melt it.

Accord Jokes More Accord Jokes

Why was Edward unable to get out of Russia?

Because he was Snowd en! (according to my friends this joke has been around for awhile, but I hadn't seen it yet, and wanted to share the goof)

How do you read the Gospel According to Shrek?

Open your bible to Psalm BODY ONCE TOLD ME

Treason Jokes More Treason Jokes

Whats the difference between Zoidburg and Snowden?

both accused of treason for expressing their freedom but Zoidburg didn't get his marshmallows!

Why did the tree go to jail?

Treason

Tape Jokes More Tape Jokes

How do you suffocate a redneck?

Tape his mouth shut.

How does Planned Parenthood paint their walls?

They go to Home Depot, get paint and rollers Sometimes they hire private contractors Lots of paint and tarps and tape, it's not that fun

Librarian Jokes More Librarian Jokes

Why did the librarian hush the mime?

Because actions speak louder than words.

What did the book say to the librarian?

Can I take you out

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a politician?

Saying they are full of sh*t means 2 completely different things.

What's the difference between the people and bullets?

The people miss Harambe.

Camp Jokes More Camp Jokes

Who left these bodies here?

Get them back inside the camp!"

What do you call it when Al Capone goes camping?

Criminal intent.