Snowden Jokes

What does a whistle-blower do during a Russian blizzard?

Nothing, he's Snowden.

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Why does the NSA hate winter?

Because they're not used to getting Snowden. (I'll see myself out)

Why did Edward miss his flight out of Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

Why couldn't the whistleblower pick up his dry-cleaning?

Because he was Snowden! (Snowed in)

Why is Edward still in Russia?

He's Snowden.

Why is Edward Snowden still in Russia?

The airport is Snowden

Why could Edward not leave his driveway and get back to his home country?

He was Snowden.

Why can't Russia extradite US top-secret whistle-blowers?

Because they're Snowden (snowed-in). To all the folks on the East coast, stay safe and warm.

Why couldn't the NSA go outside?

They were Snowden.

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave his house this Winter?

He was Snowden.

Why was Edward stuck at the Russian airport?

Because he was Snowden.

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Why didn't Edward leave his house?

Because he was Snowden.

What did the whistleblower say after the blizzard in Russia?

I'm Snowden!

Why was it easier for the whistleblower to leave American soil earlier in the year?

It didn't Snowden.

Why couldn't the NSA do anything after the blizzard?

Because they were Snowden.

Why couldn't Edward leave Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

Why couldn't Edward leave the Airport?

Because he was Snowden...

Why was the whistleblower late for his annual winter whistleblower's convention?

Because he was Snowden!

Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?

Because he was Snowden

Whats the difference between Zoidburg and Snowden?

both accused of treason for expressing their freedom but Zoidburg didn't get his marshmallows!

Why can't Edward leave Russia this winter?

He'll be Snowden.

Why does Edward never leave Russia?

He's always Snowden.

Why can't Edward leave Russia?

He's Snowden.

Why couldn't the man leave Moscow?

He was Snowden.

Why couldn't the whistleblower step outside?

Because it's Snowden.

What did the NSA say to Russia after the blizzard?

We're Snowden!

Why couldn't the NSA leave their houses?

They got Snowden.

Why was the NSA computer programmer late for work?

Because he got Snowden

Why didn't Russia return the NSA whistleblower to the United States?

He was Snowden.

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave the Russian airport?

Because he got Snowden!

Why couldn't the ex-CIA agent leave Russia?

Because he was Snowden

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Snow Jokes More Snow Jokes

How can you find Will Smith in the snow?

Because he's black

Why did the snowman get fired from his job?

He was a snow call, snow show.

Express Jokes More Express Jokes

Why do people wear sleeveless shirts?

They like to express the right to bear arms.

Whats the difference between Zoidburg and Snowden?

both accused of treason for expressing their freedom but Zoidburg didn't get his marshmallows!

Edward Snowden Jokes More Edward Snowden Jokes

Why is Edward Snowden still in Russia?

The airport is Snowden

What do Aaron Hernandez and Edward Snowden have in common?

They're both expatriots (expatriates).

Nsa Jokes More Nsa Jokes

Why couldn't the NSA go outside?

They were Snowden.

Why didn't Russia return the NSA whistleblower to the United States?

He was Snowden.

Airport Jokes More Airport Jokes

How about a really bad food court where planes land?

Pitch for every airport

How do you get a free flight at an airport?

Take the stairs.

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why does Mario hate Punchbug?

Because he bruises like-a Peach!

Why does the NSA hate winter?

Because they're not used to getting Snowden. (I'll see myself out)

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

Why do spies never use capitalization?

They like to stay low-key.

What did the hat say to the hat rack?

You stay here, I'll go on a head

Russia Jokes More Russia Jokes

What do you call a journalist in Russia?

An ambulance.

Why couldn't the American fly home from Russia after the Olympics?

Because he was Snow'den.