Mississippi Jokes

What's the best part of living in Alabama?

You don't live in Mississippi.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

How do we know that the toothbrush was invented in Mississippi?

Because anywhere else it would've been called the teethbrush

What do you call a hippie's wife?

Mississippi

What do call a cup when drank from by a married woman?

A Mississippi cup.

What has 4 eyes and cannot see?

Mississippi.

Why is the Mississippi so wide?

Because Mr. Sippi is hung like a horse.

How did the hippie remember the number of wives he had?

He counted 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi, 4 Mississippi...

How long does it take to get from Louisiana to Alabama?

One Mississippi.

Why is the Mississippi such an unusual river?

Pupil: Because it has four eyes and can't see!

What do they call a bunch of Mississippi football players standing in a circle holding hands?

A dope ring.

How do you spell Mississippi?

Redneck: Which one The river or the state

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What is the worst way to spell Mississippi?

Correctly.

How does a Russian count '1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi...'?

1 CCCP, 2 CCCP, 3 CCCP... Iwillseemyselfout

What did the Mississippi girl say when she lost her virginity?

Get off me Daddy you're crushin' my cigarettes.

What do you get if you flip a Mississippi family's photo album backwards?

An episode of The Biggest Loser

You might also enjoy:

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why is it so hard to get to know Guantanamo Bay detainees?

Because they're too cagey.

What's better than winning gold in the Paralympics?

Having a pair of legs...... I know, I know, I'm going to hell

Redneck Jokes More Redneck Jokes

Why do rednecks like the doggie position?

That way they can both watch wrestling.

What did the redneck say when he lost his virginity?

Thanks mum xD

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

How many feminists does to take to screw in a lightbulb?

Only one. She stands with the bulb and the world revolves around her.

What should you do if you're cold?

Stand in the corner, because it's 90 degrees.

Bunch Jokes More Bunch Jokes

What's the difference between a group of pigmies and a lesbian track team?

One of them is a bunch of cunning runts

What do you call a long bike ride with a bunch of cheap wine?

Le Tour de Franzia

3 Jokes More 3 Jokes

What's worse than dropping a scope of ice cream?

Dropping 2 scoops of ice cream. What's worse than dropping 2 scoops of ice cream? Getting a hand chopped off. What's worse than getting a hand chopped off? Getting both hands chopped off. What's worse than getting both hands chopped off? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping 3 scoops of ice cream.

What are the first 3 words in every authentic Mexican recipe?

Steal a chicken

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do you call a dangerous fish who drinks too much ?

A beer-a-cuda !

Why do hipsters prefer to drink their PBR warm?

So that they can say they liked it before it was cool.

Bad Idea Jokes More Bad Idea Jokes

Why is it a bad idea to swim in the Mississippi River?

Because it has pp in it.

Whose bad idea was it to text him a 4th time just in case his phone was being weird?

Tequila, I'm looking at you.

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

What can a monster do that you can't do?

Count up to 25 on his fingers.

What's Subway Jared's favorite TV show?

19 Kids and Counting